Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My husband said he did better financially when he was alone. It really upset me.

My husband and I have been having some financial issues, We had money we could have saved but didn't. All our bills are paid up tho. My husband can't seem to deal with the stress of supporting a family sometimes. He's a great father and husband but falls apart when things don't go the way he wants financially. Anyway, what he said to me today really hurt me. He apologized but I had been losing confidence in him slowly and this has made it worse. I feel like I want to take my daughter and just leave. Any Advice?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:09 PM on May. 24, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (9)
  • I would take my children and leave for a few days. Then see how he really feels.
    itsallabtthem84

    Answer by itsallabtthem84 at 6:10 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • Then why did he get married? He sound selfish to me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:11 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • He shouldn't have said that but people say things they don't mean when they're mad ya know? it will be okay. Im sorry about the financial stuff though
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 6:12 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • Sit down and do a budget. Follow it STRICTLY.

    You say you had money you could have saved...why didn't you? There are likely lumps you have to take.

    I would NOT let this get to me. Instead I'd use it as incentive to get serious about the finances with him. Let him see that you're taking an active role in saving, and then he'll start telling you he'd be in the street without you. **smile**
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 6:12 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • I think he didn't mean it hurtfully. I think he was just being logical. Sure he was doing better financially before he had a wife and children and mortgage. So was my hubby. Now our husbands have bigger debts and more responsibility. I think he was just stating fact and didn't mean it to hurt you.

    I agree with gdiamante. Times are tough now. You 2 just need to sit down, make a budget, and stick to it. Cut back where you can.
    ThrivingMom

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 6:16 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • every decent guy who gets in a financial rut gets upset about it, they want to be able to help the family financially, and if they're hurting that means they can't. it can often be depressing at times. maybe he was just frustrated and just talking. truth of the matter though, is that most everyone does better by themselves financially.

    right now we're hurting, dh is actually jobless, and he's upset that he can't help the family financially.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:18 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • I was better off financially when I was single, too. I didn't have a fantastic child , beautiful house. In life, there are trade-offs.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:18 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • No, you don't leave. Sheesh! He gets stressed. You help him un-stress. Point out the advantages to not being single anymore. Of course everything in life is cheaper and easier when it's just you, but that's not an option. He has you and a family, so he just needs help dealing sometimes. Be a good wife. Help him through it.
    Pnukey

    Answer by Pnukey at 8:34 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • maybe you should get a part time job, that way you are also bringing in money and wont feel so dependent on him. i can only imagine how it feels to hear your dh say that to you.
    3xangel

    Answer by 3xangel at 9:17 PM on May. 24, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.