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any help running away????

I have joint custody with my abusive ex, and he doesnt follow the orders from the court. Ive been back there and talked to them, no one can seem to help. I'm at my breaking point, I feel like he will haunt me forever. When he does have the children he doesnt take care of them, and yet I still feel like Im stuck with him. I cant put up with his BS anymore. Ive tried talking to him, with lawyers, nothing helps. Honestly I dont want to have anything to do with someone that tried to kill me many times! Why do I have to suffer! I am hoping that someone knows of someway to start over, I need to get me and my kids out of this place, away from him!


Asked by Anonymous at 7:39 PM on May. 24, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • you're probably best off doing your own investigating regarding the law. i clearly remember conversations with my mother about her friend whose husband disappeared with her daughter and the law was unable to help her because he had as much right to the child as she did. check your custody papers - that's probably where your particular rules are clearly spelled out. meantime - document and keep bothering CPS - kids don't cry regularly over neglect or fear going where they are neglected, this happens when they are being abused. probably your best bet is to make CPS or other body help you get a child psychologist involved - someone who can really find out what is going on with the kids. you can't fault yourself for not reporting now - too late and that is unfortunately typical in abuse relationships. know your rights before you take action.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:57 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • I know it sucks but if you run with the kids and he has joint custody you are only screwing yourself and these kids because if you are caught you will face kidnapping charges and the chances of him getting full custody of the kids are extremely high.

    Answer by AngeLnChainZ at 7:40 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • I agree with Angelnchainz. If you run and are caught you will go to jail. They will not just let it go because of how he is being. You will go to jail and he will keep them all the time.

    Answer by SoniaL at 7:43 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • If he TRULY tried to kill you on more than one occasion, then why is he NOT already in prison? Did you file charges against him? I should think a felony would prevent him from having joint custody. That said, if he TRULY is the unfit parent you say he is, start DOCUMENTING his neglect, and REPORT him EVERY TIME! Force Child Protective Services to investigate him. IF your allegations are true, he will lose his joint custody, and then when you have achieved sole custody, you can up and move to some NEW undisclosed city/state and start over! Until then, you will be seen as breaking the law.

    Answer by LoriKeet at 7:44 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • mommy...
    he wont fight for custody, he doesnt take care of them as it is. In Texas you can not kidnap your own child. There is no way he would even want full custody or get it, he was behind on his child support when I had full custody. I only agreed to it bc I was scared. I wouldnt want child support money from him, I could care less. The kids cry everytime I tell them that their they have to go to their dads. Its hard to explain how horrible this guy is. I've had CPS involved, they made him do parenting classes. Ive called them 100 times they said this exactly "We cant do much on neglect, we are really only worried about abuse". I know most of you are trying to help, but I do plan on making a plan to run away from him... yes he has tried to kill me many times, Ive call 911 a few times, he was there the first few times and I was too scared to say anything. I was a young mom and I dont have any family. Ive called and reported

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:50 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • In every state it is against the law to take a child from the parent regardless of whether you're the other parent or not. He doesn't have to fight for custody in order to file kidnapping charges against you. You are missing the point here, regardless of whether he would want to take the kids from you or not if you run, you are breaking the law. But hey if you don't want to take advice of those looking out for the best for your kids then do whatever you want. But do know, what you are planning on doing IS illegal.

    Answer by AngeLnChainZ at 7:52 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • get a restraining order asap. and if the kids testify that he doesnt take care of them when there with him that may help ur case

    Answer by newmommyjazz at 7:53 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • other times of abuse that he did to me, I called when he tried to shoot me, when he pushed me out of a moving car, and lots of other times. You know what the police say??? Well stay away from him, I tried to go to a shelter, but they said they didnt have any more room. Ive called lawyers and so many other people and they say they cant help. No one in Jefferson county tx knows how to get a restraining order. believe me Ive called. I finally got away and he keeps on. I know most of you are trying to help, but I know there are some people on here that just want to be mean. Ive done CPS, and called the police they said they have helped all they can. I was hoping someone knew of a program to help relocate. I know alot of you think that I will get kidnaping charges, and I talked to the police and lawyers and they said no, I wont. they even suggested I run away. If someone could help me figure out how to get a restraining order, Id

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • Go to and link to KNOW THE LAWS then find your state. See what it says about fleeing with kids or contact your local domestic violence shelter and ask them the law on leaving with the kids.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:57 PM on May. 24, 2010

  • if you can get documentation of the advice regarding it not being illegal to leave that's probably your best bet. also, whatever the violations of the court order are - unfortunately if you can't get any other legal documentation than that, then that's your best bet.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:58 PM on May. 24, 2010