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Am I being stubborn? Or am I just crazy?

Hello cafe mom, I am a married mother of an 2 year old. My husband has this so-called bestfriend that he known since highschool and she's a female. I don't know her nor do I want to meet her. She be claiming him as her "babyfather" or her baby or her "pain in the butt". When we have problems he tells her everything mind you they were seeing each other back in the day. What should I do I mean I tell him I don't like the fact that he still keeps in contact with her or any of his exs and he gets offended and tells me off to hurt my feelings! Please can I have some advice!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:16 AM on May. 25, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Its unusual for you a wife not to know her husband's best friend, even if that best friend is a female. I have a problem with her calling him her "baby Daddy" and all the other stuff and I believe you have every right to feel the way you do. Until this issue is resolved, he'll continue to hurt your feelings whenever you bring her name up...
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 11:19 AM on May. 25, 2010

  • I personally wouldn't feel comfortable with that type of situation. I think its wrong for a husband to run to another woman that he once had a relationship with to dicuss problems with his current wife, I think that is very disrespectful. Youre going to have to have a serious talk with him and hopefully he understands and tries to do something to make the situation better. Good Luck.
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 11:33 AM on May. 25, 2010

  • Don't mention her. If he makes a date to see her, then get yourself invited along, too. How you just can't wait to meet his dear friend! Or if you want to mention her, keep it light and smiling. Don't show jealousy, and don't behave as though you are trying to restrict him. Make your home and your family the best thing that ever happened to him so that he doesn't miss the other woman who I am sure does not nag and whom he only sees at her very best and on her very best behavior.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 11:34 AM on May. 25, 2010

  • Time to get yourself a man you can talk to. He'll change his tune quickly!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 AM on May. 25, 2010

  • When you get married there is a line "forsaking all others". Forsaking means giving up relationships with other women (best friends, just friends, exes, lovers, babymothers, whatever you want to call other women).

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 11:41 AM on May. 25, 2010

  • While I understand your feelings, my ex also had a "best friend" who he used to date that I didn't like simply because they lost contact and didn't speak for years and then re-started their friendship but if your husband has been close with this woman since before you got married I don't think it would be right to try and make him end his friendship since you married him regardless of that friendship in the first place. Two of my best friends are guys, one single and one married. I dated the single one for a year, the married one I made out with a couple times when we were teens, though I have not been involved with either of them since we split but have kept a close friendship with both of them. I know all of my single friend's various girlfriends, and I am also close with my married friend's wife. I don't get why you wouldn't want to know your husband's friends.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:12 PM on May. 25, 2010

  • Oh and by the way me and my guy friends call each other plenty of names, nicknames which are much worse than that. It's also not unusual to find me sitting on their laps or borderline cuddling on a chair. We don't mean anything sexual by it, we're simply a perverted bunch and my married friend's wife is right there with us and has no issues because this is the kind of friendship we've always had and she's been included in it since the day my friend brought her home.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:14 PM on May. 25, 2010

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