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What would you do?

My hubby and I have been together for 6 yrs. He has an 8 yr old son from a previous relationship and then we have a 2 & a 3 yr old together. When we got together/married he was in the process of taking his ex to court to determine support and visitation. He has never completed this however he does pay her weekly in cash an ammount that she came up with (he pays her more than double what our state required ammount for their situtation is...). But the real kicker is in the 6 yrs she has never let him claim his own child, not once !! She says "you have other kids to claim!" and just leaves it alone! When I bring up the fact that he told me this would be taken care of he says it's not my business but I take care of his son 3 days one week and 5 the next week while they work. And I work nights till 2am & get up at 6 to watch my stepson and his moms gf child also. I'm about ready to just leave ;(

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:07 PM on May. 26, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • It IS your business. Your husbands business became yours with marriage and vice-versa. He needs to get his stuff together. Since there is no order, she can take him to court and say that he has never paid and then he would owe back child support if he cannot prove that he has paid. AND he is able to claim the child every other year on taxes. Sounds like she is a money hungry woman.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 12:10 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • I would say something to all of them and I would also set up some boundaries.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:10 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • First off he should never pay cash. That's considered a gift. Send a check or money order that says CHILD SUPPORT and no way would I send more than what the state says I have to. Are you saying he pays her big bucks AND he has the child? I'm not understanding why you babysit if she has the child and where did the gf's child come from? Tell these people no. I would charge for babysitting but that's just me.

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:12 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • it IS your business...not only is he your husband but you are helping raise this child. you cannot control the child support issues but if neither of them respect you for helping them out. Leave! You have to take care of your own childrens needs first. Let everyone else do it without you.

    Answer by MomInc at 12:27 PM on May. 26, 2010

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