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what do you ladies think of this?

he and i broke up a couple of weeks ago. i was devasted what i didnt know was he was too. we have talked a few times and we dont want to be completly out of each others lifes. we want to be friends and he wants to see my son who he adores. my son wants to see him too. so now what do i do ladies. he came to my house like a man and talked to me about somethings. he says he wants to talk more but he had to go to bed. he had to work in a couple of hours. he wants to be included still in my babies graduation. (hes graduating pre-k). i dont know what to do i dont want him out of our lifes either but it is so weird being his friend. im proud of us though we've kept our body parts seperate. lol.. needing advice i think im loosing my mind.

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Asked by TreQuansmomma at 1:46 PM on May. 26, 2010 in Relationships

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Answers (8)
  • I think if you find it hard being friends then dont give the guy mixed signals.

    Answer by navajomama7 at 1:50 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • Just leave it the way it is go with the flow and see what else happens he sounds like he wants to be involved.
    Why are you not together anymore? If you want to say. GL

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 1:55 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • thats the thing he said the same thing its weird. its not so much hard as it is weird, you know we were togather for 2 1/2 yrs we were always friends but to be just friends now is weird. he even said it himself that he doesnt know how to go about it. hes like i want to see you guys but ... i told him he could come up or call. people here(my mom and sister) are tryin their best to make it something more. they think that we should cut all ties because we broke up we shouldnt even speak. im so under their thumb that its sad. im not tryin to give him mixed signals at all. he knows how i feel about him but it wasnt going to work. the thing i dont know is do i call him like we use to just to remind him of Tre's games and things or do i let him do all the contacting me. thats mainly where im confused. i dont know if its right for me to invite him to hang out or what.

    Answer by TreQuansmomma at 1:57 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • ok ladies im going to be completly honest. im too immature.. lol. there i said it. at least thats what i think. he said that it was 3 things.1 i let people run all over me. 2 my house is a mess.(it was so cluttered it was sad i wont lie. depression is getting the best of me. i got it took care of last night though.)3 my sis took the car he just helped me get and wrecked it. she tore my front end up and busted my radiator. it looks horrible. after he told me that he didnt think she could drive. i let my mom and my sis rule me over him. he was supposed to be my fiancee not them.. im just confused because he showed up at my house monday and stayed for 2 hours. he just stood in my kitchen and talked to me. we both realized that we were so stressed out and we never talked to each other about it . we didnt want to burden the other. we need somewhere that we can talk with noone around to influence it.

    Answer by TreQuansmomma at 2:03 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • You two need some time apart first. Going straight to being friends after ending a relationship together is a bad idea. You need some time apart to reconnect with yourself and to accept the end of the relationship. If you want him in your life then you'll get over the awkwardness of not being in a relationship with him. It can be done, but you need to let the relationship completely end in full before moving on to the next step.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 2:09 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • what im mainly wanting to know is do i call him or just let him contact me? that doesnt seem like much of a friendship on my part. i want to let him know about my sons last game... my son would want to see him and i know hed want to see it. we dont talk on a everyday basis anymore so i dont know what to do?

    Answer by TreQuansmomma at 2:10 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • thats what i was thinking but at the same time this is kinda giving us both clouser. you know what i mean we dont talk to each other all the time barely at all. we have both moved on to gettin our lifes on track and finding our own happiness. we already decided that there was no hope of being a family again. he knows that i wont take him coming home again. we both have said we'll always want to go back but we wont go back. it hurts to much when it ends. what about my son? he is the only father hes ever known.

    Answer by TreQuansmomma at 2:13 PM on May. 26, 2010

  • ok ladies im very proud of myself. we've been friends for a while now. we both said we loved each other. its just right now we need to get our lifes togather not worry about being with someone else. we may never get back togather but ive got a good friend right now. we havent hung out or anything. i dont think hes ready for that lol. we talk all the time. im going to let him continue to be his father and a good friend. only God knows whats going to happen.

    Answer by TreQuansmomma at 10:56 AM on Jun. 16, 2010

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