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he wont talk about anything

my husband has a three days off for the weekend hes been working then been helping his brother in law after work all week only coming home to sleep he promised me last weekend we could go do something b/c he drinks everyweekend monday i found out i am having a miscarriage and ive been home with our 2yr old son and he told me tonight when he was drinking hes going to a bond fire and going fishing and drinking both nights this weekend i told him i wanted to do something w/him and hes like you will be with me and i told him that i didnt want to go out and party! i dont drink i asked him if we could take our son to the zoo and he said he didnt know and then he told me to shut up hes going to bed since his beer was gone was bitching b/c i dont work well we both decided i would stay home with our son and then said he doesnt know why he comes home to me i started crying and he said cry baby your suppsope to be the adult not the baby

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on May. 28, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • he drinks everyweekend and i never say anything unless he doesnt come home until the next day... he told me he was going to quit doing this to me... im so tired of everything being about him... he doesnt care that me and our son sit at home all the time we are about to buy a house and im not going to keep going b/c of the way hes being
    its always about him we have to cars and he drives either one to work and he always makes sure theres no gas in the other one so me and our son are always at home...... im just so upset i never tell him anything to make him feel like a inch tall i always tell him hes a great worker and a dad
    i have tried to get a job but when i lived at home my dad was very controling and never let me work now that im trying everyone says i dont have enough work expierence (How are you suppose to get expierence if you cant find a job) i dont know what to do i hate him for what he says to me i feel like he
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on May. 28, 2010

  • its not really the drinking that hurts me it that he doesnt care how i feel i really wanted another baby and we tried and it finally happen and then i have this whole miscarriage thing he wasnt here for me at all just pretty much shrugged it off and he never wants to do anything its always doing something with someone else!!! im tired of him treating me like shit we are suppose to be a family i have been threw alot with him and if hes upset i will be there for him anytime im upset its pretty much shut up i dont like feeling like this its not always been like this but the last 2 yrs its been getting worse i have left to my mom and everything went good for a week
    we have been together 5 yrs almost 6 been married 2 i love him with all of my heart but hes changing and i dont know what to do he wont talk about anything:(:(

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:21 PM on May. 28, 2010

  • why r u reposting this?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:21 PM on May. 28, 2010

  • b/c it wont let me into the other one for some reason i cant open it
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on May. 28, 2010

  • give him an ultimatum. either you work on the problems or leave.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:23 PM on May. 28, 2010

  • sounds like you are both unhappy in the relationship and it is spiraling and causing you both to behave badly, it happens, it actually sounds quite similar to my marriage a few years ago, so I can really sypathize with you, I really do. Im sure that right now you feel like you are the only one trying. Thats how I felt too, but I decided our marriage was worth me changing to fix it, and if it didnt work after that so be it. Well I changed myself. I am nicer to him, I dont complain, I talk him up and treat him well, and make home the place he wants to come to retreat, not to hide in a bottle of beer (although he is free to have one if he wants) . Now we have a pretty great marriage. My first step was reading and doing the love dare. This showed me that a lot of what was going on was his reaction to how I was treating him. ( he wasnt treating me well, but you can only change yourself) then I read proper care and feeding
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:33 PM on May. 28, 2010

  • husbands by dr. laura (good book, I recomend giving it a try, even though most people hate her), and I started treating him with the respect he deserved, got dressed everday, started making myself pretty for him, started acting like I did when we first started to date, being sweet, loving, and a good wife. Things only went uphill from there. When I started being nicer to him, he started being nicer to me, then he wanted to be here more, and wanted to be with us. I recomend that if you want your marriage to work then its up to you to do what it takes. If it doesnt work so be it, you can move on. I also recomend "the surrendered wife" or joining one of the surrendered wife groups here on cafe mom, it helps you to give up control over your husband, (that you didnt really have to begin with) and to let your husband take the reins. This has truelly saved my marriage. Good luck =)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:44 PM on May. 28, 2010

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