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My hubby thinks of the kids more than me ? I feel taken for granted.. we never make love anymore? is this normal? also he goes into my wallet and takes money witihtout tellingme even thought I told him I dont like that.. anythuoghts?

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rose1239

Asked by rose1239 at 7:58 AM on May. 29, 2010 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • Do you make the money or does he? I think it's normal for him to think of the kids more, they are his kids right? It just means he loves them IMHO. Have you talked to him, about how it's making you feel to not make love? He shouldn't be going threw your wallet but maybe he feels he is entitled to the money since he makes it? Which is something to talk about also....If not I would hide it in a different place, so he doesn't know since he isn't respecting your wishes. I am sure he wouldn't like it if you disrespected him
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:03 AM on May. 29, 2010

  • With the money part. My DH does the same thing. Takes money out of my purse. I told him if it is my purse it is my money. Does not matter if he earned it or not. That did not work. He still takes money out of my purse. I started hiding my money after that.
    And the rest of your problems. Just sit down and talk to him about it.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:18 AM on May. 29, 2010

  • It is normal for him to think about the kids more than you just as you think about the kids more than him and yourself. It is something that is natural as a parent, kids come first. My husband takes money from me when i get it too. You just have to hide it. You do need to sit down and talk to him in a nice and calm way. Explain how you feel and try to figure out what to do about it.
    mrsbean08

    Answer by mrsbean08 at 8:29 AM on May. 29, 2010

  • I will prolly get slammed but oh well. YOU and he come first, not the kids. because without you 2, there would be no kids. its crucial to foster and baby your "couple-ness" because then you can parent together in love. when the kids come first all the time, its easy to feel unimportant, not a good thing to feel. so yes sit and let him know how ya feel, rememeber to talk in "man" speak lol. as for the money(sigh) hide it, sad but effective.
    Bearsjen

    Answer by Bearsjen at 8:43 AM on May. 29, 2010

  • atleast he cares for your kids could be like my dh and walk out on me and our son and think he can come in and out of our lifes and hes not doing anything wrong
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:58 AM on May. 29, 2010

  • Just tell him that you want to be part of the circle. Men don't think about things like making you feel like you are being taken for granted. They think women are settled in like them and are happy just being in the family. Talk to him and I agree with Louise, hide your money. I've always done that. Once it's in my hand it's mine and I have a plan for that money (bank acct, vacation fund, new shoes, bills, whatever). I'm not going to let someone come along and just take it out of my purse....ok, I would if they have a gun!
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:43 AM on May. 29, 2010

  • I think you should sit down and talk to him, tell him you feel and see if the two of you can come up with ways to spend more couple time together. What about getting a sitter and going out on a 'date'? My hubs and I do date nights it is nice to have some time away just the 2 of us. If you feel left out of the family-- maybe suggest some family fun activities you can all do together. In our house we have 'family fun days' where we will spend the day as a family and do fun stuff. Sometimes it is just pizza and a movie, other times it is a trip to the zoo or fun park. As for the money, I would tell him point blank "hands off the purse! How would you like it if I started going thru YOUR wallet and taking money out of it without your consent? Touch the purse again and I will return the favor!" My hubs knows better than to go thru my purse, if he wants anything that I have in it he hands my purse to me and asks me to get it.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 12:49 PM on May. 29, 2010

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