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Do I have a right to be upset

I am pregnant with my third child and I really didn't want to have anymore kids. I was planning on an adoption since I really can't afford an abortion since hubby got laidoff. I thought my hubby would agree but he didn't.

He says we wants to keep the baby even though we can't support anymore kids. I don't think this is fair we have two kids already that we can't afford why make us and the baby suffer anymore.

And not only that but I planned on going back to school and working full time so we can start saving and fixing our lives for the better but its going to be even harder to do with another kid.

Don't I have a right to be upset?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:23 PM on Jun. 1, 2010 in Pregnancy

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I'm pregnant with my 3rd too.It was not planned.I was not very happy about it.It took me about 3 months to even tell the family.Its not what I had wanted.But it is what it is.I became so depressed over it that I was put on an antidepressant.I made myself start looking at this situation in a different, more positive light. Were having another baby! YAY! Another precious bundle of joy, another person to love and love us back. Another toothy smile, another laugh to fill our home.A blessing in disguise. I feel much better about it now. I will be 25 weeks in 2 more days. Were are happily anticipating our newest family member.We have decided that after this one, DH will get a vasectomy.But for now, this baby, this child..he was meant to be a part of us, and I will not think of him in any other way. Best wishes to you.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 2:41 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • I think its rong for marrid couples that are still love to give some of their kids up for adoption and keep the others. Keep your baby. Its not only your choice. Its your husbands as well. It takes two to make a baby. He wants to keep the baby so you're going to have to keep the baby.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:27 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • I think you are being selfish. Get assistance!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:34 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • op

    I already have assistance anon. I am trying to get off of it and having a third kid just puts me deeper in the system

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:37 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • A baby is a blessing, you'll be fine.

    Answer by acurran88 at 2:45 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • I don't really think you have a right to be upset at all actually!

    This is HIS CHILD TOO. It's incredibly selfish of you to think that you can make a decision like that and that he'll just go along with it. This isn't a dog for Pete's sake. It's a baby.

    Adoption is wonderful if it's right for everyone involved but it's NOT a decision to be taken light and it's NOT something that is going to be easy no matter how much you don't want the baby.

    It's going to be painful and it will affect you for the rest of your life BUT you can not and will not experience any of these feeling if your husband doesn't agree. He has EVERY right to keep the baby that you do.

    Honestly how would you have felt if he had wanted to give up your first child for adoption and you didn't?

    I think if anything he has a right to be upset.

    I also think you should consider a more permanent form of birth control if you don't want more.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:01 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • ANON :34 you are calling her selfish but yet telling her to get assistance? Ummmm... at least she is smart enough to realize that she cant afford to have another baby, so how the heck is that selfish? I personally think having more kids while already in the system is selfish but maybe thats just me!!

    OP... I just went thru what you are going through except my pregnancy was after a one night stand with my ex husband. All 3 of my kids have the same dad but I knew that I could not afford to raise another child. I am not on assistance nor do I ever plan on being and i certainly wouldnt keep a child just so I could get assistance. My birth son was born on Jan 4, 2010 and I placed him up for adoption. Yes it was hard but it was the best decision that I could have made for all three of my kids. So yes, I agree with you and with your fears

    Answer by Jaydin_Makenna at 3:39 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • This is something the two of you will have to come to agreement with. The fact that you are choosing life for your baby is wonderful.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:18 PM on Jun. 1, 2010