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I'm not comfortable during sex! HELP!

I recently had a miscarriage, went through a depression and I gained some weight and I feel gross. I'm working out and feeling better, but I still feel gross during sex. DH wants to do all sorts of weird positions but I just feel fat. How do I feel more comfortable?

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:19 PM on Jun. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Maybe tell him that the 'weird positions' need to take a seat in the back row for awhile. If you arent comfortable to start with, then adding something new will not help any. Have a good talk with him, not when starting sex but some other time of day and tell him how you feel. That you are working on your body image issues and until you get more comfortable, you need to stick with the vanilla sex positions.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 5:21 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • Have you tried dressing up.. It can work wonders for your self-esteem and many are very flattering to ANY figure...

    Answer by midnightmoma at 5:45 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • I gained a lot of weight and I didn't date for years bc of it. I found out that men don't really give a flip about our fat when they are focused on sex! I lost some weight but my flabby belly still bothers me so I never undress. I dress up and have fun and never worry about my fat now. I don't wear panties so that end is accessible and I wear a button down shirt or a top where the straps can be pulled down. Easy access is the key. Once you start having sex he won't even notice that you didn't undress. If he does just give him a bj and he'll get distracted!

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:50 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • These are some great suggestions already, but how about just dimming the lights? If you don't have a dimmer, try a different colored light bulb like a red one. In this type of lighting it's more difficult to see problem areas. But judging from the fact that your dh still wants to do a variety of positions, my guess is he thinks you look just fine.

    Answer by moniquinha at 6:50 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • Thats kinda how I feel. I still do it all but I just hate being fat. I am losing weight so thats helping but its always awkward when you are not comfortable in your body.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:54 PM on Jun. 1, 2010

  • To me, I use to have an okay body and my hubby did too. I was known for my soft skin and pretty, big thighs. But lately, i've developed alot of cellulite on my thighs and butt and to me it looks awful. My husband just bought me two sexy outfits, which he hadn't done in a long time, on a trip to Vegas. I didn't wear them there because we were so worn out after hangin out in vegas, so last week i finally put one on. It was tiger print and it looked very sexy on me, but when i looked at my thighs and butt I felt so self conscience and did not want him to see me. I haven't ever felt this way about my body, but I mustard up the courage to come out, grab him a beer and woke him up and said here. He woke up, looked at me and said,"you look gorgeous." He liked it but i felt so embarrassed about my body. But that night, he did make me feel a little bit better. But i wish i could do sometin about the cellulite, then I would feel better

    Answer by mrs2323 at 2:00 AM on Jun. 2, 2010

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