Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Starting over after 5yrs together

me and dh have been together 5yrs have a 2yr old little boy and i love them both dearly i had a miscarriage about a week ago and me and dh were fighting alot i think it was just my hormones and i wasnt trying to be a B*tch i was just upset well he ended up being gone almost all weekend drinking, when i finally seen him sunday he told me he wanted it to be over he didnt want to be with me anymore.. i was so upset it hurt so bad hes my bestfriend and we talked and we are starting over i really truely dont know if this is what he wants but things have been so much better between us i really want it to work.. please give me some advice on how to start over and make things better has anyone been threw this i dont believe in giving up on marriage just b/c of some stupid fights

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:18 PM on Jun. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • Just take a break for a while before doing anything drastic. Take time to grieve and heal over your loss before dealing with dh
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:21 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • you both were going through a really hard time - it happens to all of us. it is a good time to sit down and take stock of your relationship in order to move forward. in order to make a fresh start, you do need to leave all the arguments behind and forgive, but you do need to acknowledge the things that went wrong simply in order to understand what wasn't working. it sounds like this was just a big fight, not ongoing problems. thus, the lesson is probably mainly how to be supportive to each other when things get hard and not take your stresses out on each other. sounds like neither of you was really communicating about your feelings and just lashing out. take it as an opportunity to learn how to work together better. sorry about your miscarriage.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 3:25 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • It sounds like you both took the loss in a very bad way, hurting eachother rather than recovering together - which is totally normal, it's hard to see things clearly when you suffer such a big loss (I have been there, i understand.)

    Take a breather, cool down and try to talk this through and see where you both truly stand.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • Whenever something goes wrong he runs away and wil drink he wont talk im in this for the long run.... hes not very good at talking about his feelings... but i need to know where hes at what are some ways to talk to him without him thinking im fighting...i want this marriage to work so bad but i know it takes two give me some ideas to talk to him and ways to get the spark back into this relationship please

    op
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:46 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN