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How do you deal with complaining and whining when you are "too tired"

In our relationship he is a stay at home dad and I work full time. I ave more education and we couldnt survive with just him working.
with that being said I work very hard and am rarely in the mood to do anything. He takes it so personal. He asks dumb questions like "Is it me?"
Ugh how do you ladies deal with the whining? We are compatible in every way besides he would do it 8 times a day and I am a once a week girl.

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SaturnsMom

Asked by SaturnsMom at 10:10 PM on Jun. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (920 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • You learn to just block it out so you don't hear it after a while.
    evelynwest

    Answer by evelynwest at 10:11 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • LOL evelyn that made me giggle a little. Maybe I need to invoke the MP3 player to get the point across.
    SaturnsMom

    Answer by SaturnsMom at 10:14 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • think about it..... if a woman came on here and wrote a post about her man is always 'too tired', etc. and she is wondering if it was her, would you think that she was being stupid? that's a normal response. but anyway, just be straight with him and say i'll promise you once a week . anything more is a bonus, but i'm gonna tell you right now whining and complaining is not making me want any kind of bonus lol.
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 10:29 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • PrincessBeth we are in a stable enough relationship that he should know it is not him. If it was I wouldnt be in the relationship. I didnt mean dumb as stupid I meant he is being silly.
    SaturnsMom

    Answer by SaturnsMom at 10:34 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • again, when your partner rejects you, you always feel it's something wrong with you. totally normal feeling for him to have.... not silly at all.
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 10:35 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • Well, thank you PrincessBeth79 for your valuable psychological insights.
    SaturnsMom

    Answer by SaturnsMom at 10:42 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • you're welcome :D my pleasure!
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 10:43 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • you act like my dh only care about your feelings its hard to stay at home w/the kids give him some of you time
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:04 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • I agree with Beth. As stable as you think your relationship is, he probley still feels rejected,. After all, that is what you are doing. If you were in his shoe's, constantly being turned down, dont you think eventually you would wonder? Also look at it this way, how are you really going to feel if he stops "asking" all together?
    RheaF

    Answer by RheaF at 11:23 PM on Jun. 2, 2010

  • I'm in a similar situation, minus the whining. He's a SAHD, I work 12-hour shifts (7am-7pm) three or sometimes four days a week. On my days/nights off, we have a certain time (9:23pm) that he will come into the bedroom and see what I feel like doing, if anything. On the nights when I've worked all day, he sort of assumes that we won't be knocking the bottom out of the box spring because he knows that I've been looking at and cleaning up other people's bodily solids and liquids all the livelong day and I just might not be in the mood. If I do happen to be in the mood, I will text him from the bedroom. Things didn't start off this smoothly though, we had to talk about it and come to a mutually agreeable arrangement. Just doing that solved any hurt-feelings problems and there was no more whining.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:40 AM on Jun. 3, 2010

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