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How do you share responsibilities when you both work FT?

Ok, I work full-time and come home to do 90% of the childcare and groceries, dinner, etc. It is getting very frustrating but my husband has a very demanding job and is back in school for a PhD! I'm going to scale back at work, but in the meantime, I am stressed. I need him to take more responsibilities, but at the same time, feel bad b/c my job is less stressful. What do you do in this situation? Do you have a schedule or some way to ensure everyone pitches in equally?

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danielp

Asked by danielp at 1:13 PM on Jun. 3, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 11 (542 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • I have the more stressful job and I attend school full time. I still do 70% of the cleaning. He does the dishes. I stay home with the girls all week while he is at work and then he stays home all weekend while I am at work.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 1:19 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • I guess at our house, we both work full time however my husbands job is more physical and he also works nights. I end up doing around 90% of things around the house too - But he is very helpful when I ask and will do things on his own Also without needing to be asked - we do work as a team but its hard to explain exaclty how when I turn out doing so much more than him lol! but we do make it work the best we can -
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 1:35 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • We take turns. Every other night either I put DD to bed or DH does. DD likes the switch off too. The same goes for baths, we switch off who gives them. I do the grocery shopping every Friday, and DH cooks the meals during the week. Cleaning takes place on Saturdays, when we are both home anyway. Since we both work, the house isn't getting that messy anyway, so cleaning isn't a huge deal.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:57 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • My husband gets the little ones ready for daycare in the mornings while I get ready for work. He works from home, so sometimes he has dinner started before we get home. Other times he takes the kids out to play while I cook dinner. I do a lot of grocery shopping after the kids go to bed, or he watches at least one of them if I have to go to the store on the weekend. After dinner I usually give baths while he cleans up the kitchen. I do most of the laundry and a pretty big share of the cleaning, but he takes care of the yard. We also have one teenager, and she takes care of the trash, breakfast dishes, and a few other chores. She also helps keep the little ones occupied sometimes while we are doing other tasks. We don't have any sort of schedule, but we have fallen into a routine that works for us.

    TweenAndTwinMom

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 2:23 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • I think you should talk to your husband and let him know you are stressed and see if you both could come up with some kind of compromise so the chores are shared a bit more. Maybe you could try splitting up the chores a different way or alternating--- like Mondays you cook supper while he supervises the children , and then Tuesday he cooks and you have child duty.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 4:42 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • I dont think that both parents should work outside the home, but if it is nessacary everything should definatly be 50/50
    JoLee12345

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 5:09 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

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