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Big decision to make.

Yesterday I found out my husband was asking my cousin to send him a picture of her breast. I went to his work to confront him about it but as soon I walked up he was sitting on the ground working on something and I just kicked him in the face handed his coworker my rings and sat in the car crying. We finally go to talk but my emotions got the best of me. I love him, he is my best friend, my true love. We a have son together and another on they way. What do I do? My heart says stay but mind says go. But even if i do leave where will i go. I have no family i can stay with, I have a a little over a hundred dollars to my name and that is it. No job fixing to have two kids. . I just don't know does anyone have any advice. How to work through this or how to get out?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:48 PM on Jun. 3, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I love it! You kicked him in the face when he was down. Most would say that was not right, but i give you props.


    I would wait a few days then listen to your heart once all the drama subsides a bit. there may be something to the story that you're missing. Don't leave just yet, he did not cheat on you, he was just being a total moronic, idiot. Let the anger die down & talk to him like you are friends, not foe's. Try not to hit bellow the belt, because nothing gets resolved when you do this. Stay above the belt, talk to him with respect when you're ready & then make your decision to stay or leave.

    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 1:54 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • Sounds like you want to stay so he can support you, not because you love him. You dont' kick someone you love in the face even if your mad.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:51 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • you kicked him in the FACE? wow. i agree with anon though. it sounds more like you are staying for the support, not because you love him. go to dhs and get on hud, they will give you a place to live, you can get on food stamps, and they even have cash assistance
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 1:54 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • People do things in anger which can be irrational - I don't necessarily think that means there is lack of love, unless of course there is a pattern. I DO feel that you have 3 choices (keep in mind we know little of the situation) - a. stay and feel insecure about your relationship until he ends it. b. leave and always wonder if that was the best decision for ALL of you. c. Go to counseling immediately. There, you will learn whether or not you should stay married...in a safe environment with a professional to help heal and mediate. Clearly, my opinion is - choose C. Good luck!!! ((HUGS))
    Heather_Rayne

    Answer by Heather_Rayne at 1:58 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • what did he give as a reason he was asking your cousin to do this - not that one is valid but just curious how he tried to explain this
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 2:00 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • After that... why would he want you back?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:02 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • you said you talked, what was the outcome of your conversation with him? did you get to the bottom of why he did what he did? You have to figure out if you want to stay with him and try to work things out, please do not let others here influence either way, it is not just about how you feel but you also have a child and another on the way that you have to think about, maybe right now it's not the time to just pack and leave, if you decided to leave make sure you work out all the details do not act out of desperation, remember think about you and your kids not him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:03 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • His reason ha. He said he just wanted to see some boobs. (he was honest) I told him well that is what i or porn even is for. He said it porn is different cause it isn't someone he knows. HELLO THAT'S THE POINT!
    And he had asked me earlier that day but i told him no because i was very busy and aggravated.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • Yes we talked and he apologized, i told him about my feelings etc. we talked for hours.
    I do want to stay and he wants me to stay I am just not sure if we can ever get this FULLY worked out.

    I mean I do have a one person I could stay with I just don't want to go.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:09 PM on Jun. 3, 2010

  • I would of kicked him too, maybe twice. It doesn't matter whether he wanted to see some boobs or not. And how comfortable would you have to be (on a sexual level) to ask someone to send you a picture of their boobs. I would have a hell of a time getting over this too. To me cheating is not just physical. It is straying out of your marriage for ANYTHING sexual, mental or emotional form another woman that you should be getting for your wife. If my SO had asked my cousin for a picture of her boobs, after I kicked him and called him a sicko, i'd be packing his bags. It all starts somewhere and there is absolutely no reason to allow yourself to be disrespected like this! GL
    leslie_zoe2010

    Answer by leslie_zoe2010 at 2:16 PM on Jun. 3, 2010