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is this mean of me?

my son is 18 months and i laid him on our bed where he sleeps to go to bed. he keeps trying to climb down and is screaming his head off because he doesnt want to go to sleep. im RIGHT by him on the laptop but not on the bed.

if he climbs down i keep putting him back on the bed. he is throwing himself around pretty much just throwing a temper tantrum...

he doesnt do this with daddy. he lays right down and goes to bed. is this mean of me to do???

im THIS close to putting him in his room in time out.


Asked by Anonymous at 1:40 AM on Jun. 4, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • I don't think it's necessarily "mean" of you, but you should have and NEED to have a consistent bedtime routine. You can't expect your child to lay down and go to sleep while you're playing around and doing other things right near him. Pick a routine and stick to it. Bath, story time, a song - whatever, just be consistent so he knows what to expect when you say it's "bedtime". Otherwise, he's confused because you are still up and rattling around in the same room.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • No not mean.

    One thing is getting a routine going, a bedtime routine, dinner, clean up..... brush teeth...... so on. Story then bed. We do a story every other night. : )....

    Another thing is, turning lights dim, or off, close the laptop for 15 min to get him eazed into the bed as apposed to interested in what you're doing.

    You may want to start working on him sleeping in his room.

    OR hey... : )

    Say you have a choice, you can lay nice and quietly in my bed or you can go to bed in your bed. Follow through.

    Consistency, routine, and a choice, you can do this or this, ( go to bed or sit in time out) ( go to bed in my bed quietly or yours you can scream all you want)

    Good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:45 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • an 18mo old doesn't understand a time out. I would bring him to bed w/ me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:58 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • Why don't you lay down with him cause he wants your attention and thats why he is acting out cause your on the laptop and he wants your attention. I think it is mean of you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:29 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • It's not mean of you. You are there in the room, so you haven't abandoned him alone and upset, but at the same time, you're saying no, it's not playtime or time to run around - its time to lay down and go to sleep.


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 5:21 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • You're not mean, if anything, you're a wimp for giving into him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:16 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • He sees you with the lap top and doesn't think it's bedtime yet. Mom's busy so I'll just get down and play. If he's not tired, don't make him. Maybe give him some toys or things to do on the bed while your on your lap top? He'll stay in one place giving you a break. Get him his own lap top in the toy section. My kids had a really nice toy lap top they enjoyed playing with when I was on mine. They're usually educational too so it's an added bonus. :-)

    We do the family bed too, and I've learned my kids will not sleep unless I'm going to sleep too. For them to sleep we all have to lie down and turn out the lights. I can't be doing anything or they won't sleep. It ends up that my kids and I have the same bedtime, but it works here.

    I wouldn't stress much about bedtime. He's still little anyway.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:49 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • I agree with this: "He sees you with the lap top and doesn't think it's bedtime yet. Mom's busy so I'll just get down and play." You are sending him mixed messages and he's confused. Also, the light from your pc screen is keeping him up.

    You don't put an 18 month in time out. That would be mean.

    If he won't stay put on the bed for night time, then teach him to sleep in his crib. My DD co-slept with me for her first year. I finally decided to put her in her crib when at 13 months old no one was getting any sleep. She'd roll around, crawl around, even jump on the bed. With me right there, even trying to nurse her to sleep, she would not sleep. I put her in her crib, and after a week we were all getting a peaceful night's sleep.

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 8:54 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • Children should be sleeping in their own bed.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:03 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • Do not lay him down with you unless you want him to still be sleeping with you when he's starting school. Advising you to put him in bed with you is the worst advice you'll get. Start a routine. Dim lights, brush teeth, put him in his own bed, read a story, and walk out of the room. He'll cry at first then go to sleep. When you're doing any of this routine, don't have your laptop on.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:34 AM on Jun. 4, 2010