Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

is it the same first LOVE?

Do u have the same feelings that u had 4 ur DH before u got married and having kids?I still do love him but I dont think it s the passionate love that I had before it s more responsible rationnal love. What do u think?am I the only one?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:29 AM on Jun. 4, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I think Love comes and goes. You will have passion and then you will have not so passionate. You change you grow up and things take more of your time then back in the day when it was just the two of you and you could have sex whenever and wherever. You could go out to eat and not find a babysitter or worry if you will get home late. Life changes and we all change with it. I think you can find your way back now and again to the days when it was romantic, but it takes work. And who wants to do that after working all day and running after children, bath time and bed time and cooking and cleaning.....the list goes on. So my answer would be Yes I have been there and found my way back you just have to be willing to work at it, and that means both partners. You can not make it work all by yourself so he has to want it to (and what guy doesn't) so you just set aside time for the two of you and before you know it you will have it back

    Answer by Savymom25 at 11:42 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • It is stronger. I dont think love comes and goes for everyone. Even when we were going through hard times I never stopped loving him, and he never stopped loving me. Even when he has had a long day at work and me with the house and kids, we still find time to cuddle on the couch and watch TV or maore;) lol. Yeah, it has changed, but it has not gone downhill. It's just different, and hoestly. I wouldnt go back to those days if I could. The waiting and planning make those moments so much better.

    Answer by RheaF at 11:54 AM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • Oh hey I didn't mean that love goes away I just meant that the level of that loves goes up and down. My husband and I have always loved each other even in the hardest times. Its just not always the passion it was back in the day. I wouldn't change it either but sometimes I understand the want for some steam that isn't always there.

    Answer by Savymom25 at 12:02 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • Its different, its not quite as romantic like it was when I first fell madly in love with him and just couldnt stand being without him, and I got butterflys in my stomach everytime I was going to see him. We went through a really rough patch during our first year and half of marriage, and right after we had our daughter, but working through that really strengthened our bond, and I have a deep respect, and deeper love of who my husband really is, even when I was in love with him in the begining I was trying to change him. Now I have learned to accept him exactly as he is, and even the trates that make me crazy I adore in a little way. So I think our love has grown deeper, and more meaningful, but its not that passionate kind of love that it was in the begining. But we do try to have passion now and again.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • That probably means that that is not the soul mate God intended you to have!

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 2:41 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • I have never loved someone as much as my first boyfriend who shredded my spirit when we broke up like ten years ago...I am married now but I do not think I have the ability to truly be "in love" ever again, I have been with and dated many many people since the first love but it has never been the same. As for my husband, my feelings of love towards him are always the same it doesn't really change

    Answer by mysilentmorning at 6:35 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.