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I am so torn

Ok is the reality of my questions before. My best friends daughter who is 8 is dying of brain cancer. I like so many others have prayed and yes, I was a die hard core Christian and tried to believe in miracles but the truth is...I just don't see it. So my question is this...does this higher power choose when and where mircales happen? Does it depend on the person or situation?

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Asked by WonderWoman1979 at 11:06 PM on Jun. 4, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

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Answers (16)
  • so many people have their faith tested when bad things happen. my personal beliefs are non-christian and are such that good and bad things happen and are all part of the way - there is no explanation or reason, only perhaps that the person's time here is done and maybe they will return in another body that is healthier. i remember a sermon my stepfather (a UU minister) gave after 9/11 - it was about where was god, the question so many people ask when tragedies occur. i'm not at all doing the sermon justice, but in a nutshell, his point was that god was in the response of people to each other, to strangers. in my experience, i guess that everything happens for a reason, but sometimes the only reason i can understand is that my experience allows me to provide empathy, guidance, and support to someone else in that situation. without bad, good is meaningless... i'm so sorry for your friend and her child. (hugs)

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:16 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • WonderWoman - I am a die hard hard core Christian...not the type with a bunch of rules, just the type who has a personal relationship with Jesus Christ...however the was a time when i walked away because so many things happened that shook my faith.....

    I have seen both sides of your question... I know someone who was completely healed of cancer... not by treatment but cancer gone. Then I know someone who was young went to sleep and didn't wake up. Why was one spared and the other not? In the grand scheme of things only God has the answer.. but i have learned, especially when someone dies who has been prayed for that they would be healed.. that God has answered the prayer, sometimes a person is healed instantly, sometimes it's a process, and sometimes there healing comes when they are completely restored in Heaven. I only no there is nothing that could shake my life is a miracle as is my sons.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:17 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • I got ya. I mean i guess that makes sense. it just seems unfair you know? I don't believe there is a reason this little girl is sick. Not at all. I understand the thought of being healed when she is in heaven. I get that but it still to me seems wrong somehow.

    Answer by WonderWoman1979 at 11:19 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • I'm anon1117-
    wonderwoman - I know alot of people don't like it when Christians say they will pray for them, but I hope you don't mind if I pray for your friend, the child, and you... that there would be healing and peace... and strength to get through a very difficult time. Also, that you will have the right words and the strength to be there for your friend,


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • i thank you for that. While I am no longer Christian, that doesn't mean I stop caring or appreciating and trust me, she needs all the guidance she can get. It was so hard seeing her in that bed suffering. I guess that is what I can hope for is that she no longer suffers. This cancer is sooo difficult and the doctors honestl don't know what to do at this point. It is not just that scenario for the reason I walked away but it def had something to do with it.

    Answer by WonderWoman1979 at 11:21 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • Here's the thing... While Miracles DO happen, they are rarer than rare, if they weren't they wouldn't be miracles! I am a firm believer in the idea that some things just have to happen, even when we see them as negatives, in the long run they could be blessings, just sometimes it's hard to see the blessing while we are living what seems to be a curse. My point is that not everything is meant to be different. It horrid that this is happening to such a small child, but have you considered WHY it may be her time? What if her soul is ready to pass to a better place? What if she is meant to be a guide for someone in greater need? I know those are hard things to consider when someone you love is in this position. But for me it's always something I consider.


    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 11:31 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • I'm so sorry..... it hurts so much when children die, my best friends daughter died at age 3, my daughters playmate at the time, I now know that though she is gone she will be brought back in the resurrection just as she was only in perfect health to be raised by her mom, I love knowing that I will also have my mom and two brothers back, this is my hope as Jesus said, "all those in the memorial tombs will hear my voice and come out" I know we all suffer from "time and unforeseen occurrences" because we're imperfect but that will change......

    Answer by lisarose45 at 11:31 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • The only thing I can think to tell you is, we may never know. And, honestly, I don't think we are meant to. There are just some things we are not meant to know. Maybe this girl's suffering will move someone else to do great things for others. We never know the people we touch with even the smallest things we do.

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 11:34 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • I just lost a member of my family to cancer as well, although he wasn't a child, the reality of watching him fade broke my heart. I would come home from seeing him and literally be ill for the rest of the day - it was that upsetting. But now that he is gone, I know he is in a "better place," he can hear and feel us, he knows we still love him and he can't be in pain. In many ways he's still a big part of my life - more now than before in some ways. And I know when I need him he's still here. I will see him again (or at least his spirit) and I feel it every day. I'm a firm believer that our souls don't pass on until we are no longer loved on earth, I believe we stay to watch and protect our loved ones after death. And while it's hard to consider while they are ill, I know that those loved ones are there when we need the most help. We all have our purpose in life & when out time comes it comes...


    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 11:35 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

  • But she will know you love her, and she will be in a place without pain, without sorrow and where she can do a great deal of good...

    I know at the moment it's hard to imagine or even think about those things - after life - but for me it's always been a comfort when people I love are nearing their time.

    I know there are Miracles, but I don't believe they happen for just anyone. I think they are something that happens only when we are going before out time... We all have "a time" and when it's here there is no running from it. Miracles, IMO, are simply "the powers that be" kicking in and saying "It's not your time." Unfortunately, no one ever asks us if we are ready for our time or not or if we are ready to loose someone we love...

    I'm sorry for you and will keep you in my prayers! I hope that you are able to find some hidden blessings in this moment of pain!

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 11:40 PM on Jun. 4, 2010

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