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10 year old son walked in on my 17 year old son having sex

my 17 year old son Kyle and my 10 year old son Cody used to be very close when they were growing up. When Kyle hit his teen years, and got involved with girls, drinking, and other high school things, he started treating Cody as more of a little kid than a friend, which is understandable, they're in 2 totally different worlds. Cody wanted to play basketball with him a few days ago, but Kyle had his girlfriend coming over and he told him he would play after. Well, Kyle left his door unlocked and when Cody went in to see how much longer it would be.....well needless to say he was confused. I don't know if he knew exactly what they were doing, but he's asking a ton of questions and i don't know how to answer him! I told kyle he should sit down and tell him, bc hes the one that got him into this mess but he is just like " oh don't worry about it, he'll find out sooner or later, you tell him..." what should I do?!?!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Jun. 6, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (15)
  • BE THE MOM!!! I have sit down talk with BOTH of your boys!
    SAHMinIL2

    Answer by SAHMinIL2 at 3:55 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • that is a huge age gap and it's understandable that he's not really interesting in playing anymore but he should be the one to talk to his brother if the brother was confused by what he saw. their closeness will be back when the little brother gets older.
    aliishott2

    Answer by aliishott2 at 3:55 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • wow... don't you guys have locks in the door?
    Ronnie165

    Answer by Ronnie165 at 3:59 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • you allow your 17 yr old son to have sex in your house. there was your first mistake. you have to be the parent here and talk to both of them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • He is 10 .. you should have already atleast been starting to discuss sex with him. You're the parent, it isn't your sons place to be having the sex talk with his little brother unless he's comfortable or wants to do so. Go to the library, find some books to educate yourself on how to do so and start discussing this with your child.
    AngeLnChainZ

    Answer by AngeLnChainZ at 4:09 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • ummm anon there is nothing wrong with 17 year olds having sex
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:12 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • I'm not naive enough to think a 17 year old isn't having sex. Sounds like you are a single mother too, since there is no mention to dad. But you need to have a chat with your 17 yr old about better caution if he is going to be having sex at home....and that also means discussing birth control with him. If he and his girl are "mature" enough to be having sex, they should be mature enough to discuss birth control with you as well. Some may disagree, since you aren't the girls mother, but you would be a gramma to a baby should one come along. Which means you have to discuss this stuff. As far as the little one, guess you could ask his pediatrician if they can refer you to any material as to how to discuss it. Not sure how "mature" the 10 year old is as to how to explain it to him. Better too early than too late though.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:12 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • Why would you even let your 17 year old son in his room alone with his door shut with a girl anyway? He doesn't need to explain it to him, you do. Grow up and be a parent before you end up raising your sons child.
    hornz102485

    Answer by hornz102485 at 4:53 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • I'd tell the older brother to stop having sex at home with little brother around unless he locks his door. It's one thing for teens to screw around but if they will be doing it at least be responsible. As for little brother, I'd teach him respect and knocking and to NOT enter until given permission. If he is asking you the questions then you need to answer but keep the answers short and specific to the question.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:00 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • I agree that allowing this in your house in the first place is what got you in this predicament, set rules and stick to them. As far as your 10 year old being confused answer his questions thruthfully do not beat around the bush!
    older

    Answer by older at 5:33 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

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