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OMG... Not again!

I am so upset and so confused! I found out I was pregnant. I was on Nuvaring but obviously it failed. I have 4 kids (14,8,2,1) I really am not prepared emotionally for another child. I am 32 and still feel so lost. I have no family to help me and live in another state then the father of my born children. I'm a single mother. the guy I'm dating has been on again, off again for 13 years. He asked me to marry him, but thats a joke. Unemployed, felon and lives with his mom. OMG- I had an aborion before and was horrified. I swore to God and myself, I would not have another. Yet I feel trapped, hurt, angy at myself, at the birth control for failing me and angry at him for...well, just being him. God has always made a way for me and my kids. I just don't think its fair to them to add another to our already stressed home. I don't want to have an abortion, but don't want this kid. Thinking of getting the abortion pill.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:03 PM on Jun. 6, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • Having sex is a normal human act, animal to for that matter. she was using protection and it failed. Tell me you would stay celibate if you wanted no more kids. I mean really...

    OP: Don't be angry at God. This is either A) an amazing child you are carrying and God felt you were just the person to mother them or God has other plans for this child through an adoptive family. Maybe even an adoptive family that will love and support you as well. This may be the key to a whole new out look on life for you and another family. There are some very awesome adoptive families out there that to 'adopt' the mother. This may not be the bad thing you have imagined. Keep your eyes open through this situation. Ther is ALWAYS a good solution you just may have to work a little harder to find it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:11 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • if you dont want an abortion do not get one! look into adoption.
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 7:08 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • God wouldn't give you something you couldn't handle. If you don't want another abortion, there is always adoption. It sounds to me like you don't want to have another, and if you regret the last one, you certainly won't feel better if you have one now.
    acurran88

    Answer by acurran88 at 7:10 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • Adoption may be your best bet! Look into a family who really wants a baby and can not have one!A friend of mine can not have children. After years of treatments and a fialed adoption they no longer try and are so sad. I see it in the womans face everytime she comes by and plays with my DD. I wish when I was younger I would have known her. I had an abortion and I honestly would have given a baby to them! They deserve a baby! That is my suggestion OM me if you'd like!
    delilahsmom1177

    Answer by delilahsmom1177 at 7:13 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • ...Why are you having sex with an unemployed felon that lives with his mom?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:14 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • Why would you even be with a man as you have described? You deserve better than that. I'm happy to hear you're against abortion, but why not consider adoption? Wouldn't it put your mind at peace to know you gave your child the best chance for a great life? I agree with you that you're not in the best of circumstances to bring another child into the world. But if you're already pregnant, the thing you need to do now is make the choice that is gonna be best for your child. There are many couples who would welcome an open adoption which means the baby gets a good home with loving parents who can give it everything that you can't, and you can still be a part of it's life. I know giving up your baby has to be the hardest thing a mom can do, but what a loving and unselfish thing to do. Being single and not wanting any children right now, you need to know that the only way to prevent it 100% is to stop having sex. Best Wishes to you
    BlessedMommy64

    Answer by BlessedMommy64 at 7:15 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • OMG....Not Again!

    Being alone, with no support system hurts like hell. Live is what you make it, but tthere is only so much you can do when you have made so many bad desicons. No I do not want to have another abortion and I know I will be upset when/if I do. How can I have anoher child? If God does not give you m ore than you can handle, then why did he do his to me! Yeah, yeah I did this...but I was on birth control and correctly using it. Adoption is not an option. My children would hate me if they knew I gave away there brother or sister. I have 2 siblings, my mom gave away for adoption and although we speak and know each other, I hate my mother for doing it.
    As a single mom, I live for my kids and without them would be insane but, what about me? When is enough, enough?
    Any way, my hurt runs far deeper then I can say, and in tears now, I just want to say thanks for your ear.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:21 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • 7:14 PM on Jun. 6, 2010 by: Anonymous
    ...Why are you having sex with an unemployed felon that lives with his mom ?
    ********************
    This is an excellent question. Yeah, please tell us WHY??????
    You would be so much better off getting away from him and starting a new life. And either avoid finding another guy (no sex for a LONG time or get some kind of efficient birth control) in order to simplify your life . SOrry, but this is not a normal life that you have at this point. It sounds like Jerry Springer-ville.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:47 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • as harsh as it is - if you think he is no good - felon, unemployed and living with MOM, what on earth are you thinking sleeping with him in the first place- that's not a brilliant message for the kids, and tells us alot about your own sense of self worth.
    I understand you aren't thrilled about the baby, You know your choices already, you have faced that decision before, so abortion, adoption, foster care, allowing Dad to have the baby or keeping it, none are great, but there isn't any other magic fix.
    Maybe this is where you sit down and have a stern talk to yourself - hold yourself to a higher standard - if the guy you are seeing isn't worth your love and committment then don't go to bed with him- it's better to be alone in bed and at peace with yourself, than to share your body with a loser and have to deal with these sort of consequences..he might make your heart race, but it's racing right now, and not in a good way!
    myheartx4

    Answer by myheartx4 at 8:24 PM on Jun. 6, 2010

  • It's to late for the pill. The 'abortion pill' is not what it sounds like. YOu take it 24 hours after sex to prevent implantation. If the baby has already implanted it will do nothing. SO you can rule that out as an option.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:29 PM on Jun. 6, 2010