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Would you leave?

My husband was frustrated tonight and when he walked past me, he shoved me. I reminded him that if I ever leave him because of something physical, that I'll never come back. He didn't say anything and just sat in his chair for a while. He got the kids ready for bed and then called everyone, including me, into the room and apologized to the children for what they saw and told them how wrong it was and promised them it would never happen again. He then stated the same thing to me. What would you do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:56 PM on Jun. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • I wouldn't leave. He admitted he was wrong and apologized to all of you on his own accord. Does he still need to account for it? YES! you and he both need to understand why he felt he needed to resort to physical violence.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:58 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • It takes a big man to admit he was wrong and apologize. I wouldn't leave this time but if that type of behavior continues then I'd rethink my strategy.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:01 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • Appologies can't take back things like that, but you can learn to forgive. What a man for saying that to his kids and then saying it to you in front of your children.
    But appologizes don't erase what he did. I hope this hasn't happened in the past? And if it happened in the future, even after empty appologies...I would leave. There is no reason for that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:01 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • If you give him an inch he will take a mile. He just was testing your boundaries and if you let this slide it can only get worse.I suggest some counseling fast. He just lit the fire it's both your jobs to put it out before it really burns...
    michelle146

    Answer by michelle146 at 11:02 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • Original Poster here - many years of marriage and it has never happened before. And we are going through a very stressful period right now.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:03 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • Well, it's a good thing he apologized. It takes a big man to admit he was wrong-not only to his wife but to the children as well. Have you considered counseling?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:08 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • I agree with admckenzie,
    This is the one and only time it will happen. Make it VERY clear that if it ever happens again you will kick his butt out. Everybody can get caught up in the moment, but if it happens a second time, the it is developing a pattern and that is unacceptable.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 11:08 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • No, I wouldn't leave him for that. He admitted his fault not just to himself, but you and the kids and showed that he knew he was wrong.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:09 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • all the more reason to take what he did seriously. its great that he did apologize and in front of the kids and to u also. but if u even feel that he is about to do it again i would do more then remind him that IFu leave U wont b back because he did something physical. u need to make sure that he wasnt just trying to see what u would do and feel that he was sincere. stress makes us do what we want to do under ordinary circumstances but r able to hold back.
    if he ever does it again i would b out of there before he could say word. gl
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

  • Did he reach out his arms and shove you or did he use the side of his arm as he walked past to kind of lean in and push you out of the way? I was assuming the latter. If that's the case I'd just accept his apology.

    If it was the former, personally I probably would have pushed back. I wouldn't take that crap.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:11 PM on Jun. 7, 2010

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