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Should I......

Should I fix something different for my grandmother to eat, when she doesn't want what I have fixed for the rest of the family?
My 82 year old grandmother now lives with us. I would not fix something different if my children did not want to eat what I fixed. They know that they can either eat what I fixed or not eat until the next meal time. So, should I make an exception to the rule for my grandmother. She has been becoming increasingly picky as she gets older, idk why. When she first moved in with us, she was not this way. So what would you do?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:08 PM on Jun. 8, 2010 in Food & Drink

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • I cared for my elderly grandmother, and it is true that their tastes change. They are also sensitive to texture and the viscosity of the food (I don't know of a better way to word that). She used to enjoy stew but now can't tolerate the texture of the meat. She used to eat eggs but now they make her gag. She says her tea tastes bitter but it's no different than what she's always used.
    Yes, it is more work to cook separately for your grandmother but I don't think her fussiness is all a facade.

    Ask her what she would like. Plan some meals around those foods. Go easy on the seasonings until the food is served, then everyone can add to their own tastes. If you are making a meal she would not like, have something on hand that she would eat, like soup & crackers, muffins, cereal, pudding, etc. Keep in mind, too, that most elderly people's nutritional needs are not like ours. It's going to be a lot of trial and error.

    Answer by michiganmom116 at 1:49 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • OP - so far I have been, and she expects me to. But it does bother me to have to fix something completely different when I have already worked to prepare a nice meal for everyone else.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • is she capable of making her own food? if so, let her make what she wants.. but don't put YOURSELF out...

    Answer by gracefulsky at 1:11 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • OP - she is able to prepare simple things, but she doesn't like to. She would rather not eat, then have to fix it herself. Like if I am out running errands, she will wait until I get home to fix her something to eat, even if I am out past meal time.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:15 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • i would keep simple things around that she likes and can make herself. maybe try to think about her likes and dislikes when planning a meal. i would not plan around her too much though. maybe let her try some different lunch meats and cheeses.

    Answer by jennifer588 at 1:20 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • Well she is 82 I would indulge her. However when thinking about planning meals I would ask for her input. I would love to have my 85 y/o mother living with me however I am sure she would drive me barking mad. I so wish I had a compliant personality.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 1:26 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • OP - I've tried that, but she says that she doesn't like lunch meat anymore, or peanut butter and jelly, hotdogs, mac and cheese, or grits(which is my ds favorite breakfast). My children are 6 and 4, so these are some of their favorite type lunches. She also, does not wear her false teeth anymore(she says that she doesn't like the way they make her food taste, idk) so that also limits what she can eat. Idk, but it just gets frustrating sometime. I feel guilty because she IS my grandmother, but I have to fix foods that my dh and children like as well.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:27 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • OP - her reasons are usually that she doesn't like that type of food anymore, or she can't chew it well, or it's too spicy, but because I have young children, I don't cook really spicy foods. And she is afraid to cook, because of her physical limitations, but she won't even fix a sandwich or bowl of cereal for herself. Her therapist told her that she needed to try and do more for herself, but she said that she "just plain don't feel like it".

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • Michiganmom - OP here, that makes a lot of sense. Some things she loved 6 months ago, now she won't even touch.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:57 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • Quit whining and give her what she wants. She is 82 and won't be around forever. When she is gone you will be glad you did.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:36 PM on Jun. 8, 2010