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If a family member has cancer and full insurance coverage and plenty of good income from their work and their spouses work is it rude

To ask why they are having a fund raiser and where will the money be going


Asked by Anonymous at 3:57 PM on Jun. 8, 2010 in Health

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I don't think it's rude to ask where the money is going. Too many fund raisers go in the pocket of the family to go shopping for shoes. That happens a lot when the patient is a kid and the parents spend the money. We had a parent arrested here for doing that

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:06 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • It is not rude to ask what your donation is going to, however a lot of times "full coverage insurance" does not necessarily pay for all of the treatments and/or experimental treatment, etc.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:00 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • Ditto to Anon.
    Full coverage doesn't necessarily mean "full coverage." And there's a lot of other expenses some people don't think might be coming out. And it depends on how intense the treatment is, what said pancer patient is able to do or not, how much help they need, etc, etc.
    I would just ask in the most non confrontational way possible.

    Answer by ManicMomma02 at 4:02 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • Full coverage does NOT mean everything is paid for. You also have to deal with one spouse losing wages for treatment (I know my cousin was going for chemo every week, and was so sick from it that he couldn't go to work). So, yeah, there's half the income gone right there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:02 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • there are still lots of copays and charges not covered by insurance

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 4:05 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • If you can tactfully ask what the money will be used for, that's fine. A lot of times it helps make up for lost wages, for transportation to and from treatments, for meals and lodging while undergoing treatment, for home modifications necessary to make the patient more comfortable, for co-pays, and sometimes even for wigs.

    Answer by MomToBeISaMom at 4:06 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • If they seem to be well of financially. I do not see why they are having a fund raiser.  They might take it as rude if you ask. But I would not be giving them any money unless I knew they really needed it.


    Answer by louise2 at 4:06 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • If they are on Medicare and they reach the "Doghnut Hole" after $3,000 on prescriptions. Any necessary Medication after that has to be paid out of pocket for the remainder of the year. If you are sick $3,000 in medicatiion may only last a few months.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:07 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • Doughnut* sp


    Answer by Anonymous at 4:08 PM on Jun. 8, 2010

  • insurance doesn't equal affordable medical bills, neither does them having jobs. There are caps on insurance, there are gaps, there are things that they won't cover, there a ton of expenses. The one with cancer will probably have to quit working and the other will probably take a hit in pay to spend time with the family. The number one reason why Americans file for bankruptcy is medical bills from a serious illness. Yes it's rude to ask why they're having a fundraiser, if you don't want to donate don't but don't ask questions like that.

    Answer by mrsjonzy at 4:09 PM on Jun. 8, 2010