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Do you live for your kids?

I have a 3 yr old and an 8 week old and my husband and I never do anything without them and instead were always trying to find somthing fun for our oldest to do. I think my husband and I have been out alone a total of 3 times since we had our 1st child. We just feel empty without them. I know so many people that are the total opposite of us but not many people who share the same. Im a stay at home mom and have decided that I will be homeschooling my kids. Everyone always tells me how brave I am but Im there mom and thats what I feel like is best for them. It doesnt bother me at all to devote my life to my kids. So do you feel like you live for your children?

Answer Question
 
LANDENSMOMMYlmk

Asked by LANDENSMOMMYlmk at 11:58 AM on Jun. 9, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 16 (2,456 Credits)
Answers (45)
  • Always have always will and mine are fully grown!
    older

    Answer by older at 11:59 AM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • So, what happens when they grow up and leave the nest and you have no life and no marriage left without them?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 AM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • I had a life before I had my daughter and I still have one. I think it's important that a mother not lose herself just because a kid comes along. I also think it's important that kids don't think they are the center of the universe and that their parents have time to themselves w/out the kids around.
    Kiwismommy19

    Answer by Kiwismommy19 at 12:03 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • Not to the extent you do. My husband and I don't get to be alone much but that is because we have no real support system here. We won't leave our kids with just anyone. We prefer family over everyone. That said, I do know people who do this, some we are related to, and even being around them is a huge pain. One woman is like this with her grown, legal adult, moved out of the house children. She and her husband are almost never together and she intrudes on their life in alarming ways. It's disturbing to see. Close is one thing but eventually the kids grow up and move out and should be allowed to have their own lives and families in addition to the one they came from.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:04 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • My children are pretty much my life too, but I am far from a helecoptor mom. These mothers are so annoying, it's good for kids to do things without their parents, especially go to school, this is how the grow into independent adults.
    staceynoel

    Answer by staceynoel at 12:05 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • Oh one more thing kids whose moms are helecoptor moms are also annoying, the think that the world revolves around them and many are very bratty.
    staceynoel

    Answer by staceynoel at 12:06 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • Moms should live lives for their entire family--husband included---and for themselves. I see so many Moms putting their husband and marriage too low on their list of priorities. Love your kids, take good care of them but also place more importance on the relationship with your husband. Your kids will see you and your husband as a loving couple who should be emulated and respected.
    gertie41

    Answer by gertie41 at 12:07 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • Yes I do. I love being around them. I feel bad for kids when I hear their parents say things like "school is out what the hell am I going to do" or "I couldn't homeschool because I don't want to be around my kids all day". It must be horrible to have such uncaring, uninvolved parents. And I don't worry about what will happen when my kids leave the nest. I am sure we will still see them and do things together. Eventually there will just be more people to love with husbands and grandchildren. And my hubby and I are close enough that we will enjoy our later years together even if we were alone. Enjoy your kids, that's why we have them.
    BlooBird

    Answer by BlooBird at 12:08 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • No. I do to a certain point, but I'm more than just a mommy. I think that when people live and breathe everything for their kids, the kids end up horribly spoiled with feelings of entitlement. When the kids leave, the parents look at each other and can't relate as husband and wife anymore because it's been mommy and daddy for so long. This is my theory as to where the crazy-ass MIL's come from. I love my kids, of course, but we are teaching them to be independent people, not clinging to mommy and daddy all the time.
    Pnukey

    Answer by Pnukey at 12:14 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

  • I'm a homeschooling mom, and my children are obviously very important to me, but my marriage is important as well. Without a strong marriage, we don't have much of a family, do we? We were husband and wife BEFORE we were Mommy and Daddy and we feel it's important to show our kids a strong healthy marriage relationship. We try to go on a date at least once a month, and we have never shared a bed with our kids. We spend most of our time together as a family, but we do make husband/wife time a priority. If our marriage falls apart, then there's no family.
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 12:15 PM on Jun. 9, 2010

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