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Courting vs. Dating

So I have a 8 yr old daughter. I never thought about the whole courting/dating thing until recently.We are a Christian family and I don't want to steer my daughter wrong. I don't understand courting completely. Does anyone have any advice on this? I need help in understanding the differences with couritng and dating.


Asked by somuchlove4U at 9:28 AM on Jun. 10, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

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Answers (10)
  • I believe that they are actually the same. However, courting is what used to be was all very formal, chaperones, no contact (kissing hugging), the guy asked the parent permission to take the daughter out rather than the daughter asking her parents.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 9:32 AM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • If you don't want her to deal with sex issues just don't let her court/date til she's 18 and an adult. I feel this courting thing makes her to be property of yours.You can do group activities where there is an adult present,but unless she's cool with someone following her around on her date,she's just going to be all embarrassed.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 AM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • Anonymous: Wouldn't it depend on how you go about it though? I mean I explain the courting thing to my daughter and let her know what it entails. IF the guy has a problem with it then he isn't for her. If she has a problem with it well we talk more about it and work towards something she is comfortable with.

    Answer by somuchlove4U at 10:14 AM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • Courting is an older term where, before the 20th century in this country, usually meant meeting only in public/social gatherings and required parental approval. It was the testing grounds to see if the couple wanted to become engaged and married.

    Dating still is a form of courtship, but by todays terms it is a lot more casual. Most parents don't require chaperones, kids have a lot more freedom on who they can date and where, and our culture encourages dating multiple people and waiting to get married.


    Answer by anng.atlanta at 10:30 AM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • courting - basically group activities, no alone time with just the two until the relationship is at a point where they need the time to get to know each other and this is usually after they are officially only seeing each other and looking towards marriage and they believe they are the ones God has for them. I like this idea, in our church in certain areas of ministry this is how relationships are handled with the young adults....if they are in ministry they pretty much do the courting thing and it works.

    dating - going out with groups or with just the person you're "dating" then if things don't work out you move on to the next guy.. and on and on and on until you find the one.

    courting focuses on finding the right one without getting into the more intimate areas which would be saved until marriage.

    There are some books out there I will see if i can remember the name. She's only eight so you have a little time.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:26 AM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • I was under the impression that courting was when the kid came to her house to hang out, and to spoil her with tokens of love. :P

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:09 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • I may totally be off...courting is for the prpose of marriage. Dating is having fun with no plans whatsoever.

    Answer by 3gigglemonsters at 3:57 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • Im sorry. I did not offer advice. I have an 8 yr old girl too. I have no idea, I can only do a visual in my head and it ends with..."YOU ruined my LIFE!!!" lol and Yes, ive done my job. MY dd totally hates me! LOL Im loonies.

    It may depend on your dd's personality. Is she ambitious and headstrong when she gets to be of age? Still the heart wants. I kind of picture my dd being lala for boys and falling clumbsy head over heels. Sort of like me. Uh oh.

    Answer by 3gigglemonsters at 4:01 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • The dictionary defines dating as a social engagement whereas courting is defined as special or devoted attention in order to win favour and affection.


    Answer by beeky at 4:13 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • 3gigglemonsters LOL I have that same vision!
    This has given me some ideas on how to talk to my dd about boys and dating/courting. Thanks Ladies!

    Answer by somuchlove4U at 4:29 PM on Jun. 10, 2010