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Is it ok for a 7 yr old to still be wetting herself?

My 7 yr old step-daughter still wets herself, not regularly but often. A lot of the times she says she didn't want to stop what she was doing, (playing or reading) to go to the bathroom. A lot of times we will tell the kids to go to the bathroom before we leave house but she absolutely refuses and then as soon as we get out of the driveway, she has to go and can't hold it. What can I do?

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Asked by beckomes1219 at 5:04 PM on Jun. 10, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (16)
  • Maybe it is a medical issue. You might want to find out.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 5:07 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • I would def talk to her pediatrician about it.

    Answer by rlhall1980 at 5:07 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • You take her by the hand and walk her happy l;ittle butt to the bathroom and physically put her on the toilet if needed. If you can't make a 7 yr old mind about the bathroom you're going to have a lot more serious issues in a few years. It isn't about whethee she thinks she needs to go. It is about minding and doing what she is told.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:08 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • TO ANON: I have done that with her several times already and I do have issues with her not doing what she is told, that is an everyday with her, some days good, others bad.

    Answer by beckomes1219 at 5:10 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • OP- Has she lived with you a long time or is this recent? The toileting acting out and the not listening sound like there may be something else going on. Does she have contact with her bio-Mom? First I would rule out any medical reason. Then I would sit down and tell her straight up "there is no reason you cannot get to the toilet on time. From now on you will lose a privilege every time you wet your pants. " Then the hard part is sticking to it...every single time.


    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 5:16 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • Medical, take her to the Dr.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:18 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • And if the medical exam checks out, try letting her be responsible for the consequences. If she wets herself, she will have to stay wet and clean up her mess herself. And that includes washing her clothes and bedding. (Does she manage to stay dry at night? that could be a big clue as to whether it's medical or behavioral).

    Answer by companygoddess at 6:05 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • First, check her out with the doctor. You never know and you don't want to punish for something she cannot control.

    If she has night time accidents, then it is most likely a medical issue. However, if she can stay dry at night and only has a problem during the day (particularly during playtime) then it is something else. I agree with making her be responsible for her actions. Make her clean up the mess, go overboard too- clean up the floor with a wet rag, rinse her clothing in the sink, clean her body with a warm wash rag. Make it more of a hassle to deal with than actually using the restroom.


    Answer by HistoryMamaX3 at 7:35 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • I agree take her to the doctor first. It can be a medical issue, my son started doing this after being fully potty trained for five years and it turns out there was a slight tear in the opening of his penis that hurt so he didn't want to go. It was something you couldn't see unless you were a doctor and he was embarrased to tell me.
    My doctor did say that in cases like that sometimes it can be sexual abuse. Its something, he said, that needs to be ruled out as well.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:12 AM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • It wil pass. My son used to do that and he is now an A student and never ever wets the bed at 14. GL and I feel for you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:06 PM on Jun. 13, 2010

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