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Why is it so bad that I don't leave my daughter with anyone other than her dad, and even then, only for an hour or so?

My daughter is 23 months old, and aside from a handful of times that I've left her with her daddy for an hour or so to do errands, I've never been apart from her. MIL has babysat a couple of times, but only when my daughter was in bed for the night. Is this really such a bad thing? I don't want my daughter left with babysitters, nor put in daycare, because I don't want her to feel abandoned.

But everytime I tell people this, I get lectured about how my daughter will grow up to be clingy.

My mom was a SAHM, and she never left me with babysitters. The first time I was away from her was when I started kindergarten. I wasn't clingy at all-I looked forward to going to school!

Any opinions or comments?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:22 PM on Jun. 10, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (28)
  • I'm with you. I didn't let anyone watch my children except dad until they were old enough to tell me if someone hurt them
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:58 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • I'm with you. I have 2 boys. They stay with my DH, my mom or gram and occasionally my sister - but I have never let them see a non-family member sitter. My mom especially has a BIG issue with this, but I feel it's what is best. Frankly, I think if you can at all do it that way - go for it!
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 7:25 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • to each their own. I could never do that. my son is 9 months and he gets babysat by daddy all the time. I trust my husband and I think they need there bonding time. and it's nice to have my girl time.
    Kalebs_mommy23

    Answer by Kalebs_mommy23 at 7:26 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • Don't feel bad....your child won't grow up to be clingy! My DD is 3 and i've handled it the same way. She looks forward to going places with people and doing things. When my in laws come over she's like peace out! lol Literally.
    I don't have the money to leave my kids with sitters either.....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:26 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • im a SAHM too .. ive been so paranoid this first year of my sons life about who i leave him with and things. me and my mother are really close, like best friends, so i leave him with her often, overnight too, and they both love it. but anyway, i wouldnt put him a daycare this whole first year, but ive been dying to go to the gym and loose this baby weight but i dont have a sitter for while i go to the gym. so finally just last week, i started putting him in the daycare at the gym. omg, he LOVES it. he gets SO excited when were there. i put him down, and he goes, he will crawl right up to all the kids and start playing with the toys. it is so cute. and i kind of have a new perspective on daycare. i dont think id want him at one all day 5 days a week, but i think its good that he gets some socialization and learns some independace away from me. plus i need a break sometimes!!!
    PURPULbutterfly

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 7:27 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • and i like that he feels comfortable with other people besides me.
    PURPULbutterfly

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 7:28 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • There is nothing wrong with it at all:) I did the same thing with all three of my girls. I never let anyone (but hubby) watch them until they were about 3, which would be about the time they went to preschool. None of them are clingy, they all have different personalities, none of which has anything to do with me being with them 24/7 as babies and toddlers. Do what you are comfortable with and don't listen to the naysayers:)

    shanlaree

    Answer by shanlaree at 7:29 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • We haven't left our DD with anyone other than family or very close friends. She has never had a true babysitter. I don't feel bad leaving her with her dad because he is completely competent when it comes to caring for our child. My mom even watches her for a few hours at a time. I would say to do what you think is best for your family.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 7:36 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • I did the same thing. My daughter is not clingy at all. In fact she is more adventurous and I have to make sure she is not going to hurt herself. Now I'm clingy because it feels like she can do without me lol.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:38 PM on Jun. 10, 2010

  • i am doing the same.... BUT i would LOVE to be able to leave her with family .... BUT we are a military family so we are far away from our family... it sucks... and i used to work in a daycare and i had my DD at the daycare i worked at and i hated leaving her!!! even when i could go in ANYTIME to visit her and watch her... i still felt uneasy leaving her... i am blessed to be able to stay at home with her now!!!
    chiana

    Answer by chiana at 7:42 PM on Jun. 10, 2010