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I really need support ladies....

So my SO was physically and emotionally abusive, I just packed a bag for him and told him not to come home, took his key and everything... but it still hurts because he was the father of my child and I love him, but I can't do it anymore... I can't stop crying....

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:24 PM on Jun. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Its okay to cry. Its part of the healing process. The hardest part is leaving, you did that. Stay strong chicka.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:29 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • You have done the right thing, just becareful he is not the kind to get violent when rejected. You stood up for yourself! Kudos to you! you will find a man worthy of you.
    older

    Answer by older at 4:34 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • You have done the right thing for you and your children. It is perfectly acceptable to cry, you need the release. Stick to your decision it is probably one of the best you've made and the hurt will not last forever.
    Tawanda74

    Answer by Tawanda74 at 4:36 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • Let me tell you from very personal experience that you have done the right thing. It is hard, and it is emotional, and you will feel every emotion there is. That's okay, let yourself feel them, get angry, get sad, get lonely, get even, letting those emotions through and working through them is what will lead you to being healed. It was 25 years ago that I left my abusive husband with just my clothes and my 2 year old daughter. It was a rough road but we made it. There were times when I first left that I felt guilty for breaking up the family, that's normal, but just don't fall into a trap with the guilt and go back to him. That would be your worst mistake because leaving in the first place is the hardest step, and you have done that. Get into some counseling and/or support groups as it does help. Stay strong and no matter what, know that you can do this for yourself and your child and your life will be better for it. Good luck
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 4:44 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • This is a hard time! It will get easier. It is ok to still love the good about him and choose not to deal with him. Nothing is usually all good or all bad. You can still miss the good stuff about him.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 4:45 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • You did the right thing. You really did. I left an abusive man years ago by actually running out the door and begging a neighbor to call the police. Be thankful you did it the smart way instead of having to run with your baby and have him chasing you. Cry all you want. That is part of it and it will get better. If there is a counseling center where you are, call them. Make an appointment. It helps tremendously. There are much better men out there and you will find one. In the meantime, call the police or courthouse and ask what you can do about getting a restraining order to keep him away from you and your child. Hang in there, it does get better. I promise.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:50 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • Are you serious? You are worth much more than being a punching bag. You are worth more than someeone talking down to you. You did the right thing, now get your self esteem back and enjoy your life. God bless...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:01 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • you did the hardest thing by leaving him. next change the locks. because a restraining order isn't much help. you can get a restraining order but in my experience it's just a piece of paper. no matter what he says don't go back to him. he might say i love you,i'll never do it again,i'll change,i want our family together and a bunch of other bullshit. that's all talk. don't let him fool you into thinking he's going to change. cry all you want. don't feel bad for leaving an abusive man. it's what's best for your daughter. in the long run you will be proud of yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

  • I have never been in your position however I am telling you that was the right thing to do. Keep you chin up and take care of your self and your child. My thoughts are with you...
    mmmegan38

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 7:36 PM on Jun. 11, 2010

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