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desperate

I am married and have an 18-month-old son. My husband and I get along okay but really our marriage is pretty loveless. We feel more like roommates than a husband and wife. My husband works 2 jobs and I am disabled. I cannot work and have no income but I am trying to appeal a recent ss disability claim that was denied. Money is extremely tight in our household. We have been broke for three years. I can't even afford a swimsuit.
My parents are helping us a lot with money. I feel really guilty accepting their help but I don't know what else to do.

I love my son with all my heart but I feel like I don't have any choice but to let my mom take him for a while. This is my idea; she knows nothing about it and she has never suggested I do this. It hurts me so much to even think about this but I feel like I don't love myself enough and I can't provide for him like I should be able to. I have tried talking to my hubby abou

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:49 AM on Jun. 13, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • this but even though he says he loves me, I feel like he doesn't understand me and can't possibly relate to what I am going through. At this point we can barely afford diapers. I am just losing my mind here. We are not eligible for food stamps. We have medicaid and WIC and my husband works his butt off but we still don't have enough money....I am losing my mind and I have no idea what to do.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:50 AM on Jun. 13, 2010

  • Have you tried downsizing and cutting back on everything?
    There are therapists and counseling centers that work on a sliding scale; often universities have several. Good luck to you and your family.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 7:14 AM on Jun. 13, 2010

  • so sorry you are going through this... i am sure you are a great mom and i know you love your ds very much!!
    i am sure there are plenty of 'ears' here on cafe mom that can listen to you... and may even offer some advice... please if you come across any 'not nice' replies do not pay any attention to them!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:19 AM on Jun. 13, 2010

  • I don't understand why you don't have enough money if you don't qualify for food stamps. People make it all the time. I, personally, would never let my parents have my child for a period of time. When I had my son I was 23. I stayed at home to take care of him and my husband made a total of $17K/year and was out of town for up to 2 weeks at a time, we received no PA, so I know it's hard, but I also know that you can do it. Being stressed about money can lead to depression, which sounds like what you are suffering from - talk to a dr about getting on some meds.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:14 AM on Jun. 13, 2010

  • I am so sorry for what you are going through. I am sure you have basically exhausted all your resources as to how to get more money or how to downsize. Not being able to see your way out, can be so depressing as I am sure you are feeling. Don't give up keep looking for maybe a stay at home job for yourself, even if it would be making telephone calls for an organization. Another thought is to keep looking into resources from your state. You need to feel better about yourself and right now I think you are feeling just so overwhelmed. Take some time to think everything over, and if you feel you need sometime to yourself allow your mom to take your child just until you can feel better. Maybe the little bit of time away may help you. I hope everything works out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:36 AM on Jun. 13, 2010

  • Just hang in there. It will get better. If I had extra money I would send it to you. It is very hard out there today, and people are living paycheck to paycheck. I think a lot of people. Oh please ladies ,lets be nice and support her!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 AM on Jun. 13, 2010

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