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opinions please ot this??? men wanting me?

ok, so ever since i was a teen most of my guy friends have always liked me, and most guys i make friends wiht i usually flirt wiht, i know its possible for the opposite sexes to be friends(just friends) but for some reason ive always wanted guys to want me, even if i dint like them, i wanted them to want me, like me or just want to be aorund me or find me cute. ive always been confident and never been insecure and i still dont feel the least bit insecure. but im married now, and i still feel the need to have men want me, even if i dont feel the need to flirt. is there somehting wrong with wanting to feel worshiped ( i guess thats the word) even though im married or am i just being selfish.
does or has anybody ever felt this way.? and what do you think of it?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:27 AM on Jun. 14, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • I had to read this over and over and wondered if I was sleep walking this morning and wrote it in my sleep! I've felt like this for as long as I can remember. It's great that SO understands it so I don't get in trouble flirting and craving attention from other men. I don't need sex from them but do need the attention. I hear it's bc my dad left when I was young and I needed his attention and now substitute the attention of other men. Just keep it under control and make sure your man knows it's just an attention thing.

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:34 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • Well what it sounds like to me is that you aren't getting or feeling 100% from your hubby. You are a married women still looking for something and you shouldn't feel like that in a marriage. I think that maybe you may want to talk to a professional about this cause you may have something else going on inside yourself that they can pin point and you or none of us can pin point.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:32 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • sounds like you are high maintenance.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:34 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • I feel that way sometimes and I was able to figure out that for me it is insecurity. I feel better when I know I am liked by the opposite sex, but now that I know what it is I don't want it anymore. I want to be liked because I am a good person and friend, not because I'm sexually attractive.

    Answer by Kalebs_mommy23 at 2:34 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • I agree with pp, sounds like a little insecurity.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:27 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • If you feel the need to be validated constantly that way by the opposite sex, it is definitely an insecurity, even if you don't feel insecure. It's masking a fear you have that you are not worthy, beautiful, confident, etc. It's natural for everyone to want to be liked, but not to the degree that you describe. I think you need to be honest with your dh about these feelings and to also seek counselling. Counselling doesn't mean you are crazy or have something really wrong with you, it simply means that you are getting help to work through one issue. We all have issues.

    Answer by Bellarose0212 at 5:24 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • i agree with bellarose... just because you intellectually know you are attractive or smart etc. doesn't mean that you FEEL that way... that's the best way i can describe why this makes sense when you claim you are confident, etc.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 8:02 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • i think you are doing good by realizing this is a problem for you. I've been this way before..when i was younger. I think i realized that most guys only want 1 thing. Your husband married you because he loves you for you. You shouldnt even flatter these guys. Its okay to be nice but don't let them get their rocks off by thinking they can have you.

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:29 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • sounds like you are a bit vaine, and maybe even selfish! You obviously worship yourself which is sinful! Learn to be a woman of humility! That is sad that you think you "should" be worshiped, please think before you post sad and self demeaning things on here....:(

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 8:38 AM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • please think before you post sad and self demeaning things on here....:(

    there is nothing wrong with being should worship yourself and love yourself before anyone else..don't let anybody tell you any different.

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:57 AM on Jun. 14, 2010