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How do you explain to your children about different races?

ok so here is the story i live in a town in the south where caucasian is the primary race. so my daughter who is 3 notices when someone especially other children are a different color, so we are at the park and there is 2 older girls playing one white one black and the black girl would not talk to my not so shy daughter so she says to the white girl "What is that black girls name?" i am wondering is it ok that she said it that way? is that acceptable? i am so confused i dont want her to go to school next year a be in trouble for saying the wrong thing somebody plz help!!!!!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:57 PM on Jun. 14, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (41)
  • my SON explained to me when he was about 5 or 6, because my dad is the original Archie Bunker and anything can come out of his mouth at any time...anyway ds said "we are all brown. some are very light brown (like us/Caucasian) some are yellower brown, and some are darker brown. We are all made the same, some people have different tans because their grandparents lived closer to the sun".

    I will be very interested to see how others answer this question, because it's a great one!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:02 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • There are books to help you with this. I would say though that it's not a bad idea to sit her down and tell her straight out that People come in all shapes and colors but that our insides are all the same. Slang and what is and isn't acceptable will change over time and she will learn all that as she grows, so I wouldn't worry so much about that til it really comes up. Just make sure she knows that there are white, black, brown and other skin tones out there... You could even find some pictures of different people if that will help...

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 8:03 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • There is a great book on this topic for young kids. It is a Sesame Street book called, We're Different, We're the Same


    Answer by mommyheymommy at 8:04 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • Kids are very intellectual an observant. My son calls ppl "white", "black", and "brown". I never associated any colors with ppl and nationality so he calls it how he sees it. To him Daddy is a black man, Mommy is a brown lady, and he plays with white kids. At almost 5 y/o my son is now understanding the culture and nationality associated w/ppl and their complexions, but I think its safe to say that he (as well ALL other kids w/o influence) accepts everyone as living persons only different by skin color.

    ps. I've had multiple times when my children were referred to as  the "black" kids on the playground. Its really not a problem, and anyone proud to be so would never complain.


    Answer by sugahmamma at 8:06 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • Why wouldnt it be okay? Why do you want to teach her its wrong to say certain things to black people because it may offend them. Doing that is going to make her nervous to even be around a black person..its saying "you can't be yourself"

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:08 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • I'm not really sure, my DD is around all different mixes of people.. and never points out any differences in them, she's mixed herself. lol.

    But then again, shes only 2 1/2 and is still learning vocabulary.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 8:08 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • Oh and to answer the question...

    I dont explain until my children have the opportunity to experience first hand what that nationality of a person is like for themselves. Its tough, but well worth the efforts!


    Answer by sugahmamma at 8:09 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • Most, but not all black people are ok with being called BLACK. You should just tell her that every body is the same inside. It is just some people have different colored skin, that is all.


    Answer by louise2 at 8:10 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • if your daughter calls someone black and they don't like it then let them tell her they don't like it.

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:12 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

  • I lucked out on this one. My daughter has 2 bi-racial cousins so she doesn't notice.
    I've heard some compare it to hair and eye color. Like "everyone has diff hair, diff eyes, and diff shades of skin".
    Most people won't get offended by an innocent remark from a child.

    Answer by Kiwismommy19 at 8:43 PM on Jun. 14, 2010

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