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Anyone else feel like a bad mom because you're not patient enough with your small children?

It doesn't happen all the time, but it happens more often than it should. I tend to me a some-what angry person and when I get mad about other stuff (DH, work, that kind of stuff) my patience runs really, really thin, and then I get frustrated and don't have patience to deal with my two year old. I am SUPER lucky because she is really, really good most of the time, but when I am having a bad day, then SHE has a bad day I literally have to lock myself in my room (leave her with DH) and just yell into a pillow, or cry, or even just simply be alone. It breaks her heart and she knocks on my door and cries, which makes me feel so much worse.

It is just really hard sometimes and I don't yell at her, and I don't spank her, so when she is acting up I just.. kind of lose it.

What do you guys do in situations like this? How do you stay clam and patient with them? Is it better to try to talk and get mad or to just walk away? :-(

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:59 AM on Jun. 15, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (5)
  • Yes I have been there, to me the best idea is what you are doing. Go to the room and calm down because you don't want to loose it.
    mrsbean08

    Answer by mrsbean08 at 12:06 PM on Jun. 15, 2010

  • For me, I have tons of patience when it comes to the little ones. I just find every little thing they do so cute and amazing,lol. My toddler can get frustrating at times but before I act she will smile and melt my heart,lol. It was the same way when my son was a toddler.I think of it as teaching her how I want her to behave, because she really mimics my actions a lot. Close your eyes, count.Hug her instead of yelling then talk about the misbehavior.
    NOW...let me tell you...I have no patience when it comes to my 10 year old. That, for ME has got to be the most frustrating of ages so far (I'm sure I'm headed for future suprises as well,lol). I have yelled, I have screamed, I have cursed, I have broke down and cried and there was a time or two when I tried to kick him right in the butt..but lucky for him he runs fast and I missed,lol.

    Its good to take breaks.Find something that makes you happy.Good Luck.
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 12:07 PM on Jun. 15, 2010

  • Well, if anyone here says they never lose their patience, I'm sure they are lying. We all have a short fuse from time to time. It's not right to take it out on our kids though. I've apologized to my children before for getting upset with them when they really didn't deserve it. It's important for kids to see that adults make mistakes too and we can admit when we make them. Don't be too hard on yourself, but when you feel like you're getting frustrated, you need to separate yourself from the situation and take a few deep breaths before you jump in to disciplining your two-year-old.
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 12:09 PM on Jun. 15, 2010

  • YES. Everyone experiences this to some degree. I've had moments, days, even whole phases like this. For me it got really bad for the short period that my older daughter, then 2.5, went through a really, really bad phase with fighting sleep. For awhile, I blamed my reactions on her impossible, ridiculous, insane behavior, than since then I've realized it has a lot more to do with me than with the kids. In my personal case, when it got really, really bad, I realized I was having a lot of trouble with my self and taking it out on them, and ended up seeing a therapist for generalized anxiety / depressive disorders. So I don't know if it was bad luck that this got bad while my daughter's sleep insanity got bad, or if one caused the other (or which one caused which). I flew off the handle so badly at times that I was on CM asking if anyone knew if I needed help with anger management (lol -- after the fact).
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:11 PM on Jun. 15, 2010

  • I was or can get like the ANON Answer.. my son is going on a 6 month stint of bad sleeping and when it first started I flew off the handle and we'd both be yelling at each other, then we would cry and it was a nightmare of a cycle everynight. I usually thought I was a person with a ton of patience so it throws me for a loop that my 2 year old can get me to act like this - its been a ride forsure but all I can do is try to correct my actions - he doesn't get spanked and rarely yelled at, I read books and on CM all the time so I am TRYING To do the right things, sometimes I don't though - I am working on it -
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 12:51 PM on Jun. 15, 2010

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