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How Can I help my daughter?

Four months after my divorce I got a call from my daughters school. My daughter was sobbing and saying how her father had just screamed at her for no reason. It turns out he a black out and took his depression out on our oldest daughter Emily. It has been over a year now and Emily told me how she is still afraid of her father she says she loves him and she understands it wasn't his fault but she has night mares almost every night of her father abusing her again. I don't know what to do to make her feel safe again please help.

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babyluver321

Asked by babyluver321 at 8:05 PM on Jun. 16, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I don't know hun, I feel for your precious daughter. Have you thought about taking her to a therapist, maybe have her talk to her school's therapist for starters. I'm sorry she is so sad and scared, good luck to both of you:)

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:14 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • She's this traumatized over being yelled at? Does she live with him or you?
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:15 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • geez i wish i could help, but i dont know what to say
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • she is seeing a therapist and it wasn't just yelling he was screaming to the top of his lungs she lives with him for the school because i live in a different town and don't want her attending the school in the town i live in. sometimes i feel like a bad mother not being able to protect my daughter since i only see her on the weekends
    babyluver321

    Answer by babyluver321 at 8:16 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • Take her to a therapist. Thats what they are there for. You say you don't know what to do and she is still upset after a year then it's obvious she needs some professional help to work it out.
    itsmesteph11

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 8:18 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • thank you
    babyluver321

    Answer by babyluver321 at 8:19 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • My mother had a similar episode when I was 15. It still bothers me a little to this day. At the time it terrified the crap out of me. I walked 2miles to a friends house and even after she snapped out of it and called me to come home I refused until my dad was there too. It is a scary experience. I feel for your daughter. If it hasn't happened again since that time I hope that they can work through it. Your family is in my thoughts....
    chrissifaye

    Answer by chrissifaye at 8:20 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • Hope she calm down. Kids have hard time with parents after divorce. ANd my granddaughter good example. My daughter let her go stay with dad, She thought it would be so good there. Less than 2 months she would listen to mom scream , then put up with dad. At this age it tears you apart to see her go through this.
    Listen when she talks. She will lean more and more on you as she grows up. I know you would not have left her there..if she wasn;t safe..
    Good Luck to you all.
    quiltermom

    Answer by quiltermom at 8:58 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • Just make sure that something else isn't going on. Sometimes when kids are scared they are affraid to tell you everything. If she is having that bad a time with him maybe she needs to be with you. It would be better to be in a crummy school than an unsafe living situation.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:53 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • Umm.... sorry hate to be blunt... but if your daughter is in a bad situation, move heaven and earth to move to an area where the schools are to your standard and get her out of that bad situation. I think there is way more going on in that house than she is telling you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:54 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

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