Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why is this so hard?

Tomorrow I get the keys to my new town home. I am leaving my husband. He has lied just about everything and hid so much from me. Emotionally it has been hell. His kids have treated me poorly. He says that is the best he can do. So it it is over. I thought I would be happy on moving day. To escape the emotionally abuse and cringing when he came through the door. I am so scared. I will be a single mom again and money will be tight. Am I doing the right thing? How do you do this? When does it get easier?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:34 PM on Jun. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • This is absolutely the right thing, but I believe you already know that. It will be hard, but honestly day by day it will get better. You seriously have to think if it that way, just get through today and worry about tomorrow when it comes. Otherwise you will be right back with him. Take it day by day, and keep yourself busy to beat the lonliness. Time to call up those girlfriends for some "girls night" It will make you feel so much better!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:44 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • You are torn, you must make up your mind and then do it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:44 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • It is always scary when we start over. Only you can decide whether this is best, although from your post it probably is. Money will be tight but you have been here before and you know you can do it again. There will be days fall down and nights you cry yourself to sleep. I can't think that will be worse than cringing when someone comes homes every night. You will have the satisfaction of knowing you are making it on your own and that you can stand on your own two feet. Take pride in every accomplishment as you make them. Every step is a success and don't overlook that. Message me when you need a pep talk, I will be happy to listen and talk.

    Answer by CorrinaWithrow at 10:49 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • Yes it gets easier. I left with three small children and it was scary but I told them it was a new adventure. That is how I looked at it. Give it a chance. You can always go back if you are not happy. It's easier to take you back than to find another woman who will take his crap so he'll be glad to have you come back and abuse you. Sorry if that is harsh but it's reality.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:02 PM on Jun. 16, 2010

  • u did a good thing for u and ur child u dunt need sumone like that in ur life.. trust in God and he will guide u when ur scared and u dunt know what to do he helps u hugs u.. good blessings

    Answer by Hyde3 at 12:37 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • I know EXACTLY how you feel as I have just recently been there myself. Yes, it was me that filed for divorce, but I went through some emotions I didn't exactly expect, but you know what? I'm really happy to be on my own and just have my son to take care of. I don't have all that negativity and crap when I come home and it's good. You'll be fine, just have a bit of stuff to get through but you can do it. If you need to talk, msg me.

    Answer by rio_burb at 9:57 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • when feeling over whelmed, take a moment and close your eyes, think of small things that will make your futire bright, think of what your life will be like in a year-nothing to specific, just home things, warm sun coming through your window in your new kitchen with a beautiful plant growing, the quiet and calm of your new home (no fights, or tension) time to yourself-reading, gardening watching what you want on tv, eating popcorn for dinner if you feel like it =whateverf loats your boat
    nothing to specific, but think of a general good life, what yours will be in 6 months or a year from now

    iamgining a new life will help you through this tough time
    also remember a past hard time, how hard it felt at the time, and how you can see that you made it through that, you will know that this will pass too and someday you can look back at this time and get strength from it for a future trial

    you can do it, you have before-right?

    Answer by fiatpax at 9:58 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.