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daughter jokingly hit her friend

12yr old daughter and friend in the car friend hid her headband said she didnt have it my DD just wanted it back saw it behind her and reached over and got it behind car seat(whole time they r laughing ) then DD gave her friend a "love tap" on the head (like when someone says something silly and you hit their arm like HAHA) she meant it cleary in jest and then felt horrible after because her friend got very quiet and upset she tried to text and apology a few times. mom is a friend i sent . her a message at what happened, when she got home she saw a mark on her face- my DD so didnt do it that hard her DD told her what happened.
first she should have given it back the first time my DD asked and 2nd even in fun my DD knows she shouldnt have tapped her she feels really bad i have asked mom that she tell her DD to keep it between the 2 of them - what more can i do ? my DD is a good kid and has never done this before

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:55 AM on Jun. 17, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (4)
  • She needs to learn not to HIT another kid.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 2:58 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • What exactly are you asking here and why do you keep posting it over and over? Like you said, leave it between your DD and her friend! Hopefully DD learned a lesson!

    Answer by Blueliner at 3:06 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • this is my first time on cafe mom just looking for support not critisism from anyone. dont know why it posted twice just reaching out to get advice on how my DD should handle it at school or at all

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:10 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • She should apologize for hitting her. Yes, it's frustrating and it was pushing it for the other girl to not give the headband back. But, honestly, from the description you gave and the age of the girls, it sounds like both of them were being very passive aggressive, "playing" with the other one in a way that really wasn't "playing" at all... Girls that age do that a lot.

    And I'm sorry, but if there was a mark, then, even if she didn't MEAN to hit her that hard, she DID, in fact, hit her that hard. I think that, if you're going to talk to your dd about it and make suggestions, then you might want to suggest that she apologize - something along the lines of "I'm sorry about the other day. We were both playing around, and we both took things too far, and I'm sorry that I hurt you. It won't happen again. I hope we can still be friends."

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 2:19 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

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