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Maybe I should clear it up, On post of what do you do when a person comes into your son's life that u don't aprove of?

your so right. I sit back and don't say a word. my son said it was to hard for him. so I never said another word. I still invited him and her to dinner every week. she would bring her own food. I never said a word. they told me she was pregnant, I died inside while I welcomed her to the family. I never said a word. as they informed me it was planned. in the same breath. she assured me that the right thing to do was to go to welfare on Monday and apply. Yes you guessed it my daughter held me back on that one. I created three bushiness's to keep my children off welfare. she gave my daughter and I the wrong date for the baby shower, Never said a word. I bought them a bassinet, diapers, clothes, and toys for the baby. she looked at them and said I hate Winnie the pooh and my child won't wear that S---.. I never said a word. I think the baby is over a year old. I never said a word.

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oneperfectmom

Asked by oneperfectmom at 7:59 AM on Jun. 17, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

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Answers (20)
  • Listen no one is perfect in this world and some people are to nice and kiss asses and some are just such bitches you deal with it. This is your child and for NOTHING i would NEVER walk away from my child over a women or a man. So you take what I had to say for whatever it's worth to you but if you do walk away you may want to change your screen name to "Not one perfect momma" I don't think very highly of mommas and dads that just walk away from there children.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:06 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • She seems terrible, but your son and grandchild need to be a part of your life! If you walk away from them, you are no better than her! Good luck and you are in my prayers!
    JoLee12345

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 8:18 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • Instead of never saying a word why don't you start asking her what she would like instead. w/ the food, did she not eat what you were making? any consideration given to her tastes? Some ppl don't like the same things, like winnie the pooh-did you ask her what she would like or just assumed she'd take whatever you decided looked cute? If she had a theme or an idea in mind why not get her things she'll use & appreciate? Not saying your DIL is a peach & isn't trying to cause problems, sounds like a power struggle to me. She wants to be the main woman in his life & isn't quite sure how to do that w/out throwing things in your face. Start asking her what she would like & make an effort to really include her instead of just putting up w/ her. Sounds like you have some resentment towards her & can either make an effort to like her or as you've suggested just walk away.
    Nyx7

    Answer by Nyx7 at 8:37 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • Maybe this is your problem, "never saying a word" you have all of this bottled up!!! you can express your feelings without getting nasty or creating a scene, you need to talk to this woman and explain how you have kept quite so far but that you need to let it out, and that you will strive to get along as long as she does, because ultimately what you both want is your sons happiness right? there is something in common! Come clean with the woman without getting disrespectful and strangling her, although I am very well aware this is what you want to do, use your finesse, talk to your son on what you intend to do and have him present if you want , so there will not be any hear says. Good luck mom, but it is to your best interest to try.
    older

    Answer by older at 8:39 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • op, your screen name does not go well with your attituted, or maybe that is your problem!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:56 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • You are a saint,, I don't know how you managed to keep your mouth shut,,,I would have probably gone nutty! You have a pickle,, I dont know how to answer,, but do admire you for being able to keep it all together!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 9:37 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • too bad we can't pick and chose who we fall in love with ~ and that includes our kids also ~ i feel for ya there she sounds like a winner ~ i would not worry about her ~ focus more on your grandchild and son ~
    BoundHearts

    Answer by BoundHearts at 9:42 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • Maybe the DIL should clear it up? Did you invite me over for dinner every week after you called me a whore in New York, yes you did--and to keep it civil for you and Vinny I went. I brought over my own food once to your house, a can of soup because I was sick. It's really sad that you died a little inside when you found out I was pregnant, because Zoe is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to Vinny and I. I told you I was considering WIC, which isn't welfare by any means, and if you did your research you would know this. We know, you're oneperfectmom, you did so much for your children, and thats why your son won't speak to you. You know perfectly well how old Zoe is, you know the date she was born because your niece told you.

    Cafemoms, please note that I'm not responding to be hateful, I'm merely trying to clear my name that she is trying to slander all over the internet, please base your opinion on what you think.
    LuvMyZoeBaby

    Answer by LuvMyZoeBaby at 10:14 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • op, oops!! maybe this is one of the reasons a lot go anon around here.
    It looks to me that someone is being a bit stubborn around here! and the whole story is not really coming out.
    older

    Answer by older at 10:26 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • Exactly, and cafemoms, I'm not telling anyone to believe my side. There are 2 sides to every story, just keep an open mind as to what people tell you. If you want the black and white truth she left it in my chatterbox on my profile.
    LuvMyZoeBaby

    Answer by LuvMyZoeBaby at 10:42 AM on Jun. 17, 2010

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