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is this playing favorites?

Idk what it is w my mom but ever since my sister had her kids mine no longer exist to her. She treats my sisters kids like gold and mine aren't treated any way cuz she never calls or comes to visit and when she does she never wants to take them to have any fun or brings them anything for that matter but yet when she visits sisters kids she takes them to the movies,out to dinner,buys them things. My kids are basically invisible it's insane they used to exist until she remarried and has new step grand kids and my sisters kids what went wrong?? I have no idea why she is like this at all she has no reason. the only thing I can come up with is she's like this because my kids are half mexican...mY kids are getting to the point where they notice what she does and they do not like her anymore. How Sad is this?

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chica679

Asked by chica679 at 1:17 PM on Jun. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,792 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Yeah it's sad. But all you can do is try and move on. Don't have your children around her,if it makes them uncomfortable. Let her know she's doing this. And if she still acts like she doesn't get it. Keep away from her.
    EttaMay

    Answer by EttaMay at 1:20 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • Instead of assuming things, why dont you approach her about it. You are jumping to conclusions that might not be true.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:21 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • I would tell her that if she can't treat all her grandkids the same, then she needs to stay away from your children and quit hurting them, they're just as much her grandchildren as your sister's kids are and need to be treated the same. Tell her how much it hurts both you and your kids, she may not realize, but if she does, keep her away, she doesn't have a right to hurt your kids.
    heratyc

    Answer by heratyc at 1:22 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • This is what my sisters and I grew up with in regards to my dad's mom. She would brag about her beautiful 3 granddaughters to everyone in sight. The problem with that is, someone who is a family friend on my mom's side heard her and knew who she was, and thought it was odd since my parents have 4 daughters. My mom let the friend know my grandmother was speaking about my aunt's 3 daughters. We meant SH*T to her and eventually my father gave up trying to make it work and make her a part of our lives, and his. She was a horrible person to treat children that way. Wouldn't even hold us as babies. Gave us used items for Christmas presents (used bottles of nail polish, ugly dresses she didn't want, and my dad got a ladie's gold belt). She was a real piece of work. Sorry you have to go through this too, but maybe just start distancing yourself because you won't change her, but you can change your reaction to her actions.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 1:23 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • anonomyous 1:21 I am not assuming I know. Why else would she be doin this? I guess her reward will be her grandkids not wanting one thing to do with her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:27 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • Just tell her about your observations and suspicions and see what she says. It's possible the reason is simple and not what you think. Just talk with her.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:17 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

  • i don't have any advice for you - my relationship with my mother has always been more distant than her relationship with my sister, and this carried over to our children. my daughter picked up on it some years ago and i think my mom overheard her asking one holiday why there were a bizillion pictures of my nieces all over the house and one of her. i never felt comfortable confronting my mother about this along with all the other differences in treatment... if you are able to express this to her, that would be best...
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 2:19 PM on Jun. 17, 2010

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