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Having trouble saying no

My friend Laura asked me to watch their dog. I told them we might go out of town to visit a mutual friend, although the mutual friend says now that we cannot go visit her for a few reasons. Laura said "let me know if you're not going up there, i need you to watch my dogs" Now, laura's sister is also going out of town with Lara & said "if you're watching her dog, i'll need to give my diabetic cat her shots" they live about 15 apart. Well...I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE WATCHING THEIR ANIMALS!!! I do it all the time & it's a serious pain in the ass for many reasons. I'd have to go to Laura's house 3 times a day & her sisters house twice a day. I have no reason not to do it, other than i just don't want to. I've never said no to them before, i ALWAYS help them out. Having the animals in my home is not an option. How do i say no without looking like an ass. They know I'm not doing anything that weekend...


Asked by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Jun. 18, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • This is a tough one, but you need to be true to yourself first! I had a lot of trouble saying no also, but doing it the first time is the hardest. Then you realize the world does not end, the sky does not fall............. I would try being honest with them and say that although you helped with their animals a lot in the past it is not possible anymore. That you have done it as much as you want/can. It is perfectly OK to want to have the time to yourself. You have plans with "yourself". Don't feel guilty about it either. If the friendship is in trouble afterwards, because of this, then it was not a good friendship to have.

    Answer by elizabr at 1:18 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I feel so guilty, because they do need my help. But, i'm just not feeling it. They live 20 min. from me & it takes up A LOT of my time during the day driving back & forth so many times. Would you think I'm an ass if you knew i had nothing planned but still refused to help them with their animal dilemma?

    OP here...


    Answer by Anonymous at 1:12 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • It's one thing to take care of Laura's pets but NOT for her to volunteer you to take care of her sisters. I would tell her that you are not interested in caring for the animals and that she should look into boarding them while they are gone.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 1:23 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • If my friend was upset with me because I told her I couldn't watch her animals or didn't want to watch them this time - she wouldn't be much of a friend. I would be honest with her and tell her you're not interested in caring for them this time, and she should look into boarding them. Don't feel guilty, as a previous poster said if you're friendship has trouble because of this, then she wasn't a good a friend to begin with.

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 1:39 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Why isn't "because I don't want to" not a good reason? It's a perfectly good reason!! If you don't want to watch their animals..DON'T watch. Tell them NO and don't let them sucker you in. If they get mad, then they are good friends.

    Answer by offrdngal at 2:22 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Just say "I can't do it". They will find others to take advantage of when you say no.

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:12 PM on Jun. 18, 2010