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I am sooo hurt for my kids!

How wrong is this? My hubby and I have recently seperated. I am living in our home him with his mother. My son is beyond close to him. Our son! He is 4...Our daughter is 5 months. He has the kids Friday nights from 6 - 10 while I attend school. All week we both work and his mother watches them. So he has them Fridays and occasionally here and there on a weekend!

Well I asked him what time he wants them Sunday for Fathers Day! I am soo good at keeping things civil in every way! He said it would be a great relaxing Fathers Day if I can just keep them. My son made him a gift and a card and is having a tough time with this anyways!

I am sooo hurt for him!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:42 PM on Jun. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • i would ask for maybe an hour or two. maybe at a park or something. explain to him that your son made a gift for him and would really like to give it to him on fathers day. dont be pushy about it, just explain it to him. if he still says no then just let it go, and dont hold it against him.
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 2:48 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • How heartbreaking. Ask him again if he'll see at least your son for just a bit. Maybe they can have a father/son lunch date. That would be fun & relaxing and would make your son really happy.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 3:01 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • A four year old isn't going to know which day is Father's Day. Just let him celebrate it with dad on Friday.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:08 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Wow! as a mother I can see how that's heartbreaking, even the child doesn't know the meaning of an actual day and as a mother your heart aches for your kid. Huggs mama but if dad does not feel this day is important enough to be with his children then you take the opportunity to spend time with them, his loss not yours. sorry you're going through this.
    LuvmyFam6

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 3:11 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Allow your dh the time that he wants. At that young age, the kids do not know the difference. Celebrate Father's Day the day before or after. As long as the kids get the time with him, I wouldn't push it or make it such a big deal.
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 3:12 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Op here!
    All he spends with them is 4 hours a week! Thats it..he refuses to keep either over night,,
    Its a big deal for me because every year we were together he made big plans for Fathers Day and was really involved and now he just doesnt seem interested in the kids @ all.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Is he that selfish that he can't spend a couple of hours with HIS kids on father's day? Holy crap, I'd be so pissed at him. Have you tried getting counseling for your son? You may need to look into that 'cause once he realizes his father doesn't really care to spend time with him (and he will pick up on it eventually), he may need counseling to sort out his feelings. Poor kid.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 3:35 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Rio I am looking into it now..He was such a good role model and sooo active in his life and my son loves his daddy. He tells me stuff like I love my daddy I want to live with him I dont want a mommy. His insurance wont cover it so I am looking for something affordable. It just confuses me because we live 5 minutes apart and ill let him take them whenever. He doesnt even want them fri he just takes them so I can go to school. I feel for him. At night I cry cause I know his heart is breaking.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • this is sad, and your ex is a S.o.b.....if it were me I would stop asking him to see them and I would start pulling them back from him. if he wants to see them he can come over or make arrangements, the more you pusht he more the kids will see he is doing ti for the wrong reasons. sounds to me like he is feeling like a bachelor and kids get in the wayt. one day he will realize he is an ass. I am so so sorry., ad tell your son "daddy loves you so much bit right now he is having some problems that grown ups can fix but not little boys" tell him 100 times a day its not his fault that dad has this "problem"...poor lil lamb.
    Bearsjen

    Answer by Bearsjen at 1:08 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

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