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Please help me understand WHY waiting until marriage to have sex is a good idea?

This is in responce to a previous question.............
I met my husband at 15. I was married at 19 and a virgin. We will be married 40 year this September. He is a GOOD person, EXCELLENT provider, Dad and Grandpa. BUT he is a terrible lover in bed. I know, you can't have everything, but sex is an important part of marriage. Would you buy a car without driving it?
I taught my daughters and son (who all married after college) to respect their bodies, safe sex, and sex should be with someone you love. I would never want my children to marry before they were ready, emotionally and financially. This waiting for have sex until after marriage is CRAZY!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:21 PM on Jun. 18, 2010 in Politics & Current Events

This question is closed.
Answers (97)
  • I totally agree with you, you can totally love someone and be incompatable in bed, but once you are married your stuck with a bad chemistry. I told my kids that if they ever met someone they thought they wanted to spend the rest of their lives with to try out every aspect possible that would be included in marriage, and if they learned to love every annoying thing about them then go for marriage.
    older

    Answer by older at 3:25 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I don't agree people should wait.. I wish I would have had selected the ones I had better, however I tend to agree that you need to explore all area's of a relationship before getting married, including living together...
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 3:23 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • BTW, I realized "response" was spelled incorrectly.... sorry.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:24 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I have the feeling, those who are teaching their children to wait, didn't themselves!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I can't help you, I have no idea myself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I know! You have to get your wild behavior out of your system before you settle down.
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 3:28 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I have always thought this way as well. If you cannot open yourself up sexually and know you CAN be comfortable with someone sexually, then why would you marry them?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:28 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • but sex is an important part of marriage


     Frankly I think sex is an added bonus.Marriage is more about communication and being with someone you love and care about. That said,  I think it's important to wait until marriage to prevent unwanted pregnancy, reduce the risk of STDs, ensure stability both financial and emotional, etc. However I also know it's unrealistic and kids are going to do it anyways so I plan on educating them about all the risks and ensuring that if they choose to become sexually active before marriage that they do so responsibly and with protection. I'm certainly not one that rides the "abstinence only" train.

    KristiS11384

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 3:30 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Most guys can learn how to please their lover with good communication if they want to. However a good provider and family man is hard to come by. Maybe you should teach him what you like. I would be very happy to have a good man and explore sex together than a hott lover who isnt the ther things you described.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:39 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I agree. I also think waiting for marriage is a bit unrealistic and you don't want to marry some one and find out you have no chemistry in bed. I just think you should at least wait for love and save sex for people you truly care about. kwim.
    mrsbean08

    Answer by mrsbean08 at 3:41 PM on Jun. 18, 2010