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Thought we were best friends....

So my friend is sooo mad at me that she won't even acknowledge any of my apologies or get together so we can talk it out. Im one of those people who hates confrontation and wants to apologize, hug and move on. This is what happened. The other day she was really upset because she felt all of our other friends didn't want to be around her because they were annoyed with her son so I was honest with her and told her what was going on. She is the only one out of 5 of us that has a boy that is our daughters ages. He pulls, tugs, pushes and plays really rough. Yes, he is a boy but I think it could be calmed down a little, there is a difference when he's hurting them. ALL I said to her was that he was a bit rough and mean.....that's it. Now what I want to know is if someone close to you told you the truth and had your best interest at heart, would you be this mad?

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babygirlayla

Asked by babygirlayla at 5:54 PM on Jun. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Level 4 (28 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Oh gosh I am in a very similar situation....My friend who boy was bullying others now doesn't speak to us! We tried the other approach and just took some space to see if he'd calm down bc our friends lil boy was coming home with bruises.....now she hates us and doesn't talk to us..I wish I would of said something to my friend but now its to awkward....she should appreciate the honesty....your not saying that shes a bad mom....kids will be kids but dicipline still need to happen...good luck..Im sry your going through this!
    kaleigh08

    Answer by kaleigh08 at 6:00 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • I don't think that I would be angry at all. It sounds like your friend has a serious case of hurt pride. First she felt left out and then she was criticized. I know that your intentions were good, hopefully she will come around and see that too. Right now I think that she is just hurting.
    ErinRenee815

    Answer by ErinRenee815 at 6:01 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • Nope. If my bestie told me the truth, then... no. And more than likely, I'd be somewhat aware of the situation too, obviously, she is as well, because she already guessed what the problem was. You just confirmed it, and that hurt her feelings. Not about you saying it... but about the full, absolute confirmation that her son is a bit .. unruly.
    Just give her time to clear the air. Remind her, whether it's email, voicemail, text... that you're here for her, and you're sorry that you hurt her feelings, and if she needs any help or whatever.. she knows where to find you. That's really the best she can do. She'll get over it, it'll be up to her to do something about the situation. Good luck.
    ManicMomma02

    Answer by ManicMomma02 at 6:03 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • If someone with girls told me that my boys were being rough, I think I would be the one doing the apologizing as it is not a stretch for my boys. They aren't mean, but they are 100% boy and into all the boy shinanigans. I think she needs to grow-up!
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 6:18 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • If you were my friend I would appreciate the truth! It's better to tell her then to talk behind her back.

    I wonder if she is just embarrassed? Or maybe she feels you all are attacking her? Either way, I'm sure she will get over it. Good luck!
    theutilitarian

    Answer by theutilitarian at 6:25 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • People are sensitive about their children. I'd have stopped at He is Rough and left off the "mean"
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:26 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

  • my friends are my friends because i can be honest with them and they can be honest with me without us getting mad at each other. if you are not a person who deals well with confrontation, it would make sense that you have a bit more of a problem when you do decide to be honest - i.e. if you are generally open and honest in all areas people expect that type of thing from you, but if you hold back alot, it is likely your communication could be taken to have a motive other than being open and honest... by avoiding being open and honest you are causing yourself more problems instead of the desired effect where you think you are avoiding them. there is alot to be said for learning the art of diplomacy and constructive criticism. on the other hand, you could choose to speak only for yourself and tell her she should discuss the others' feelings with them and leave you out of the middle.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:12 PM on Jun. 18, 2010

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