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Can I run away now??

My kids are almost 18 and 20 and I want to move out of state to get w/ my siblings. Recently divorced and live in a big house and get no help from the roomies or kids. Kids live w/ their Dad cause I won't put up w/ rude nor disrespectful behaviors. Never had. Their Dad w/ the income earner and traveled all over the world as I raised the girls. Since the divorce, he took a less paying job, now works two jobs and my 16/17 yr. old at the time thought it grand she could run w/o rules. She wanted to live there, leaving me! Older went off to college, then came back after just one semester! I feel my ex intentionally undermines any parenting I try with my girls. My decision was to let him raise them for the last couple of years. But now I want to move on....go near my siblings. AM I the Awful Mother they tell me I am!! I just need a life myself that isn't based on 2 adult/near adults that really a lot of grieve! I just turned 50!

Answer Question
 
WaterBaby1960

Asked by WaterBaby1960 at 9:59 AM on Jun. 19, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 1 (-2 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I think it is time to move on. They are both adults and can fend for themselves.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • I say go for it! Its time you start living your life for you! The kids will sink or swim with or without you nearby.
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:01 AM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • OMG No! You are right to want space from them. I am in my 40's, the kids are grown and on their own, except when they need stuff, of course. There are days, I am so busy running one there or watching the other ones kids, I too, want to run away. One daughter lost her license, so my life right now, is based around her schedule, and I am getting pissed. I want and deserve my freedom. When she gets her license back, I am DONE!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • Go they are old enough to travel so as long as you keep that option open they can visit you!
    snowflake7575

    Answer by snowflake7575 at 10:08 AM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • Go.
    They can come to you if they decide they want to. I'm sure once they mature, you will be happy to have a good relationship with them. Good luck!
    kjrn79

    Answer by kjrn79 at 10:32 AM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • They are big kids now. They can deal with it. You deserve to do something for you.
    PhoenixFire

    Answer by PhoenixFire at 10:55 AM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • Go and do what makes you happy. But maybe give the option of going with you if they want to. That way they can't say you totally deserted them. They do have their dad so isn't like you are leaving them completely on their own. They will make it. Whenever I was 16 almost 17 both of my parents were in prison for trafficking narcotics. (They weren't together just ended up getting caught at close to the same time) But I managed, and they will too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • What everyone else said.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 9:08 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • think we're all in agreement here...
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 1:40 AM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • I want to thank all of you for taking the time for me! This was a rough decision!!!!! Your inputs helped put my soul at ease!!! Thank you!!! Thank you!!! Thank you!!!!!!
    WaterBaby1960

    Answer by WaterBaby1960 at 8:23 AM on Jun. 20, 2010

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