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I need some answers

I read a lot about sexual abuse in children. My daughter is one and you bet your ass I watches her,but I work a 12 hour job and I can not always be there. I just want to know what are the signs. My sister told me when I change her to look at her Lucy to make sure. Because men can put there finger in there,so I make sure if there's any blood. So what can I look for and plus when she gets older. I don't want bad things to happen to her because I didn't know what to really look for.

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mamaofficer

Asked by mamaofficer at 8:22 PM on Jun. 19, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 31 (50,120 Credits)
Answers (26)
  • changes in behavior. more infections than normal.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • I'm not being rude, but why are you paranoid about this happening to your daughter? She will pick up on this fear and NOT trust anyone. LIke I said I'm not being rude. I was molested/abused by my uncle for 9 (yes NINE) years.

    To answer your question, look for changes in behavior, not wanting to go with or be around some one she is normally comfortable with, changes in attitude, changes in eating habits, all of a sudden having accidents and not going on the potty. I know some of these don't apply now, but they will when she is older.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:33 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • Thank u for the info ,being that she is one how do I know if she has an infection?
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 8:33 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • Every parents should be paranoid because you never know.
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 8:36 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • I would have to agree with Anon, WHY are you so paranoid about this? Does it happen? Yes. Is it common? NO. While there is always a slight risk, chances are it wouldn't happen to your child so checking her isn't necessary.

    I would have to agree that the first thing you'll see is changes in behavior or attitude. How does she react to people in her life? Are there people that make her anxious or that she doesn't want to be around? Does she seem to be withdrawn or depressed? Is she acting out?

    It's also important that you always keep the line of communication between you open. Make sure sex isn't a Taboo topic in your home and that she knows you aren't going to blow up for coming to you - even if you don't like what she says. I was 15 when I was raped, and I had NO ONE I could trust, so I had to deal with it myself. I already had depression issues so this made things worse. Trust me, communication is key!
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 8:39 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • To an extent, I agree with you. BUT being that I was abused I was VERY paranoid with our kids. Till I realized how much it was affecting THEIR lives. I wouldn't let them go ANYwhere with out me or hubby (this included going with the grandparetns). I realized I had to pull back a little and trust people that were around my kids. They know that they can tell hubby an I anything and they won't be in trouble.

    Since I haev become a little less anal about it, they are more relaxed and are enjoying their childhood, the way it should be. You cant' live your life in fear because something "COULD" happen.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:39 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • Here is an article you may also want to read... http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1355/is_24_101/ai_87210905/
    It's about the Warning Signs of Sexual Abuse in Children.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 8:40 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • you mentioned checking for blood when your change her because "men can put there finger in her". Why do you not trust the men that change her? How many men do change her during the day other than daddy?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:40 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • Don't be stupid that's not my child she was just saying men can do that. All I want to know the signs so I can be aware of them!!!!!!!! Just let me know the signs keep all stupid comments to yourself? And we have to watch out for women too!!!!!
    mamaofficer

    Answer by mamaofficer at 9:48 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

  • My sister told me when I change her to look at her Lucy to make sure. Because men can put there finger in there,so I make sure if there's any blood.

    That is what you wrote in your question. I'm NOT being stupid. I was just asking why if you check her because "men can put there finger up there" why you do't trust the men that change her. How was that being stupid? I was asking about something YOU wrote.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:52 PM on Jun. 19, 2010

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