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Should Father's Day be about Dad or Dad and the kids?

The way I see it, men have many days where they don't have to do anything with their kids (except stay-at-home dads). Moms either have the kids all day, or they work and then take care of the kids. I get ONE day where my husband actually takes care of our son for the entire day. That's Mother's Day and so far this year was the ONLY year I didn't have to lift a finger (MD #4). My DH has been off on workmans comp, so he has gone to Scotland for 10days, while I'm home with our son. I take my son to work with me and DH stays home and sleeps. I was in the bathroom and my son comes in asking for a shirt. Then he asks for the goodie bag he got that was out in the van. DH says "mom will get it when she's out of the bathroom." WTH? I take our son to a birthday party and DH takes his daughter fishing, but he gets pissed about going to the van to get a goodie bag? So in my case, should FD be a pamper dad day? Your opinion.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:11 PM on Jun. 20, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (10)
  • I think you should tell him hey he is your kid as well. But I know because it used to be like this for me with my first son. Hope your day gets better!!
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 5:20 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • It's about honoring dad....If you are unhappy with how your family dynamics work for the other 355 days out of the year, then you need to sit down with your husband and have a huge discussion about it.
    SAHMinIL2

    Answer by SAHMinIL2 at 5:20 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • It should be give and take in a relationship I am learning this and now I expect more tell him what you want and what you expect communicate it keep doing so until you get where you need to be. after I would start with my own goals. GL Momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 5:27 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • OP: I was fully willing to make it about dad and not have him do anything. But he took his daughter fishing while I took my son to a birthday party. Then I get home( starving) and find out he and his daughter ate all the leftovers. I tell him I'm on my way home 2 hours after he got home and he says he's trying to take a nap. He won't admit he's depressed, but all the man does is eat, sleep and use the bathroom!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:28 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • My husband was a SAHD for two years and we both work full time now and we both have the kids for an equal amount of time alone. So yes...mother's day and father's day are all about a break for the parent being honored. Of course I work weekend nights so today he had the kids all day while I slept...but if I wasn't working he would have had the whole day to do whatever he pleased.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 5:46 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • When my DH was home, (he's in Iraq currently) Father's Day was "Man Time." He took our boys fishing, swimming, or some other activity without me. "No Girls Allowed," as they've told me. ( we have 3 boys) LOL. The boys usually make him a card, and we get him some gifts which is HARD to do...most men buy whatever it is that they need so WTH are you supposed to get them, I ask you!? It is the day he really goes all out for our kids because they are the reason he gets to celebrate Father's Day. :D In your case, there are underlying problems that need to be addressed. Yes, he sounds depressed, and I would know. I suffer from bipolar disorder, but depression is only one aspect of it. You and he would benefit greatly from having a long talk about what is going on. If you can't get to a conclusion by yourselves it may be time to go to a doctor/therapist. Good luck to you.
    Mrs.B3

    Answer by Mrs.B3 at 6:05 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • It's about honoring dad....If you are unhappy with how your family dynamics work for the other 355 days out of the year, then you need to sit down with your husband and have a huge discussion about it.

    This. I guess I'm just lucky enough to have a husband that spends as much time with our kids as he can and ENJOYS it. My husband worked 88 hours( no that is not a typo) in the past week alone, and he was absolutely exhausted today. I wasn't about to wake him up this afternoon, only if the house was on fire. When he woke up, we went to his parents' house for dinner. He is a hard worker, a good provider and an amazing husband and deserves more than just one day to be honored.
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 8:05 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • It's about Dad.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 8:27 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • There are plenty of dads who work and then come home and are involved with their children...JNUST LIKE working moms. Not all dads are lazy SOBS who come home and stop particpating with their families. My husband is a dad who works and then comes home and spends time with his family. He's never gone out with friends, he has always been 100% involved with his children, he ccooks, on his days off he heelps with chores around the house, he coached Pee Wee football when our sons played, he took our sons fishing when they were younger, etc.. To me Father's Day AND Mother's Day are days were the family gets together and spends time TOGETHER. On Father's Day dad gets spoiled and treated like he deserves. At least heere he does.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:56 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • it depends on how some view father's day. some people have deceased fathers. some people have no-show fathers. look at father's day from your own point-of-view.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:08 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

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