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do you ever get over it

Do u ever really get over and stop thinking about something that ur spouse has done that hurt u?

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Alyson_Torres09

Asked by Alyson_Torres09 at 6:05 PM on Jun. 20, 2010 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,107 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • My husband has never really hurt me. We have had some serious fights over the years and thinking back he has been unfair to me sometimes, but he's so wonderful I don't even care. But I don't have any experience on REALLY having been hurt by him so I don't know..
    pipermomofash

    Answer by pipermomofash at 6:08 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • I think you can and you have to be very honest and not let it linger that is how I did it. Keep talking about figure out how you can get over it I went back to school, starting my own business and all of this keeps me going forward. GL Momma

    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 6:39 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • no. not really.. we have been together for almost 11 years.. started dating in highschool & sometimes i still remember things that he done.. I try my best to move on & not to dwindle on it... He is a great hubby just not 100% perfect-- but NO ONE is! :
    MommaTasha1003

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 6:41 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • yeah. every now and then i might remember something that he did and get upset but then also quickly get back to reality of where we are now and what we have both learned since then... it really boils down to choice.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 7:13 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • Personally. Sometimes it's hard for me to forget what my husbands done to me. We've been married for about a month and a half, and when I look at things he did behind my back when we were dating and even now it hurts like nothing else.. I'm not sure why things like that stick with me, but it is very difficult to forget so easily. I just try to realize that I am beautiful and don't deserve to be hurt, so I move on....and complain maybe a little to my best friend.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:19 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • Yes. You are in control of yourself except when you allow those thoughts to control you. You have to decide whether you will control or allow negative thoughts from the past (that can't be changed anyway) to control. You decide otherwise you are robbing yourself of happiness.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:18 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • Yes, it takes time.
    RheaF

    Answer by RheaF at 11:34 PM on Jun. 20, 2010

  • I agree with admckenzie. My dh has been dishonest over the past 18 years. There have been things (not infidelity) that I thought I would never tolerate. And for a while I did dwell on this for a long time. I was so unhappy, and decided to let it go. My dh has made changes, and we are moving forward. Now, when a negative thought pops in my head I decide I don't want that kind of unhappiness any more. And I purposely change my thought to a happier thought. It is not always easy, but my life is better for it.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 10:46 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • I can't seem to let it go it has hurt me so bad....when I think I am starting to get over it something else pops up in my mind and it just eats at me.... I love him and he's the father of my child but he makes it hard....I can't talk to him because he acts like a 5 year old n gives me the silent treatment which pisses me off even more or he has nothing to say inless its a smart ass remark...I want things to work out but honestly my love just keeps fading slowly
    Alyson_Torres09

    Comment by Alyson_Torres09 (original poster) at 12:59 AM on Jul. 6, 2010

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