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How should sibling abuse be handled?

A relative has a 10 year old boy who fights his 12 year old sister. He recently gave her a black eye. I am concerned b/c her mother does not take it seriously. I do b/c he displays bad behavior when he visits me, so much that I have stopped inviting him over. What should be done?

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hopefulspirit10

Asked by hopefulspirit10 at 12:04 AM on Jun. 21, 2010 in General Parenting

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Answers (8)
  • You could report his behavior to social services and they could make the mother take him to counseling. They would also provide funding for this if she was unable to cover it.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 12:13 AM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • i agree with the above poster.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 12:34 AM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • I think she needs to nip it in the bud. My stepson and stepdaughter have a habit of gangin up on my 12 year old, they have the same dad. they are 17 and 19 and decide to harrass him when i leave out. When I find out about it I snap off on them and threaten to tell they're dad. It calms down for awhile and then later on comes back. These are grown ass people harassing a little boy and I let them have it. If this child is physically abusing the other one, that's dangerous and needs to be stopped right now!
    mrs2323

    Answer by mrs2323 at 12:48 AM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • If school was in session I would suggest that the girl talk to a school counselor. They are required to report to CPS if necessary, but they also have access to both kids and can offer their services to fix the problem.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:18 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • Call CPS; it abuse and the parent are ignoring it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:09 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • Physical abuse should NOT be tolerated.......period. There are resources out there and after making the first call or report to CPS it is about staying involved in making sure that this is stopped IMMEDIATELY. The cycle must be broken in order for any real progress to be made. The abuser needs help and the person being abused is NOT the person who can do that. This is not something that should be ignored.
    Peachie87

    Answer by Peachie87 at 8:04 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • I would need a lot more information to know how to respond to the question. Most brothers and sisters fight and once in while someone actually gets hurt. Are you saying he is systematically abusing the girl? Does it really seem pathological? Is the mother someone who you believe has displayed very bad judgement in the past, or is it possible that she has a handle on the situation? Is the mother disabled or mentally incompetent? Do the kids not go to school? Does the boy get in trouble for beating up children in school? Is the family completely dysfunctional? I would tread very lightly and be cautious about getting involved in other people's families and calling CPS is a HUGE step. Honestly, if you want real advice about this, you would need to provide a lot more information about the family's history and the general functioning of this boy and the other family members.
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 8:37 AM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Sounds like the mother is in DENIAL, and needs to come back to reality. Calling the child protective services in your area would help. www.familyvoices.org has a state by state list of advocacy resources. good luck! Diane
    diane08502

    Answer by diane08502 at 10:16 AM on Jun. 22, 2010

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