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My 6 year live in boyfriend has a 20 year work relationship we a female married coworker. Recently I found out she is having marital problems that she asked him not to tell me. Now we fight alot over her. My intuition says she is interested in him.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:36 PM on Jun. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Has anything happen that made you believe that? Is she coming on to him? How did you find out did he tell you? Need details
    Claudiomom

    Answer by Claudiomom at 3:44 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • Yes you may be right...why would she say that because she doesn't want you to know for what reason? you are his girl and he obviously tells you stuff so whats to hide you are on the same side he is unless she does have other motives and wants to rebound with him. Good luck follow your intuition.... women are evil sometimes, not all women, but I am sure you know what I mean. Take care & stay strong!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:47 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • trust your intuition. and your boyfriend. unless he gives you reason not to.
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 3:50 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • A friend of ours mentioned it and when I asked him he told me what she said. Once I started feeling uneasy, I checked his text messages and she had sent him one alluding to him as "hot". I confronted him and we argued. Now he says they won't be friends outside of work, but still won't admit that she crossed the line. It's making our relationship uneasy.
    jos55

    Answer by jos55 at 3:53 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • They've worked together 20 years? Seems like something would have happened by now, if it were going to. What do they do together outside of work? Ignore the rumor mill & deal with the facts. A text like that, however, would be very bothersome...it would make me very uneasy and I think you're right to be concerned.
    Sandy1220

    Answer by Sandy1220 at 4:53 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • maybe this has nothing to do with anything, but why havent the two of you gotten married? Is the the one holding back? If so, I would be very insecure. Do you have children together? I happen to think that where there's smoke, there's fire. Especially if she's calling him "hot" :(
    charlottej

    Answer by charlottej at 5:12 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • I think you should trust your inner voice. But don't confront him unless you have facts. Nothing will make you do something faster than someone telling you that you have done it, when you haven't done anthing. Pray about it , keep your eyes open and either he is yours or he isn't.
    TwinkleC

    Answer by TwinkleC at 5:34 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • She's probably just his "work wife". That's not a bad thing. It doesn't mean she wants your dh. If it bothers you that bad then call her and talk with her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:04 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • Yeah, this would make me so uncomfortable. Rumors or not, I would really want to limit their time together.I think you need to approach this calmly, don't accuse but let him know the whole situation makes you uneasy. Do it without anger. Don't push him to her, and don't let this drive a wedge between you, it could be exactly what she wants.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 6:25 PM on Jun. 23, 2010

  • Thanks everyone, I've never been a jealous person and this is just bothering me. He has stopped all the after hours contact even though he says I'm crazy and he's giving up a 20 year friendship. I told him he still sees her at work just not alone after work hours. Is that asking too much? Also, I used to be friendly with her and she knows she has caused a problem, why hasn't she reached out to me and told me there is nothing going on?
    jos55

    Answer by jos55 at 11:51 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

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