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If you are the 1st wife (EX WIFE)

Why do you try to have control in your ex husbands life, as if you own him or as if you're still together. I KNOW SOME WOMEN AREN'T LIKE THAT, SO IF YOU'RE NOT PLEASE DON'T RESPOND. I just want to hear from these women that wont move on. Just b/c she was married to him first or had kids with him.


Asked by Anonymous at 9:53 PM on Jun. 21, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • my husbands ex wife had a fit!! when I became pregnant. she found out when we all ran into eachother at a restraunt..she demanded that we leave when he took he outside to set her straight he later told me that i was carrying their baby and then another time when she learned he was buying me a house she flipped out saying it should be her house...thing is she ended their marriage by cheating..yet she thought she could still have at him like he would love her forever...some women are just plain nuts!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • OMG really? This is why one should not get involved with a married guy. Yuck. Drama Llama!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:11 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • Look what you need to understand is that if for no other reason but those kids that the first wife had with your now husband thats why jf she needs help then help her whats wrong with that why not try to get alone I am not one of those ex's that hold on but look and see why he is wanting to help her and stop being a nag

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:13 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • Involved with a married guy? LOL she said ex wife! not present wife.
    I don't control my ex.. but his girlfriend thinks I do, all I friggin' want is the child support.. I don't even care anymore that he doesn't see them (other than that it hurt them), at least I don't have to worry about their safety while he has them.

    Answer by MJ_BN_FE at 10:15 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • And I don't think these woman have any idea what you're talking about. That or they're reading into it like they're some type of therapist. I know exactly what you mean. Like they get mad if their ex goes out and they know about it, or if he buys his girl something nice, stupid crap like that..

    Answer by MJ_BN_FE at 10:18 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • probably depends on WHY the marriage broke up.


    Answer by Anonymous at 10:19 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • OP~punctuation never hurt anyone! It actually makes reading responses easier!
    My husband has put his foot down and told his ex wife if it doesn't concern his children, it doesn't concern him. So I am not the one being a nag! I am just observing some of the questions and answeres on here and was just wondering why some women are like that!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:20 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • OP~ She definately tries to be to involved but my dh thankfully doesn't allow it. One perfect example I have is... When she found out I was pregnant with our 1st baby she threw a fit. she got her tubes tied after they had their 3rd. She wanted him to pay to have her tubal reversed. He finally got tired of feeling like he was a doing a balancing act and told her to back off.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:25 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • I have the opposite issue, with an ex that still wants to believe he owns me.

    IMO, he does it because he sees what I have become (myself again!!!) now that we are not together, and he openly admits to wanting that part of me (so he can destroy it- as he tried so hard to do when we were married).
    What he says holds no bearing on my life, my decisions, or my happiness. I have simply had to learn to tune it out. My suggestion, is that you try to do the same, otherwise you'll be miserable.

    Some ppl simply can't let go. For whatever reason, refuse to move on and be happy that they are alive... Where the kids are concerned, he has minimal say (legally), but we do make the effort to communicate openly about what is in their best interest. I know were the roles reversed, I could be seen as meddling for the simple fact that we maintain contact because of the children. Though, I honestly don't care what he does- it doesn't affect them

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 10:27 PM on Jun. 21, 2010

  • This is an interesting question. I have an ex and he is single at the moment. He pays child support every month like he is supposed too. Things have been tougher for me lately. Way more bills involving the kids. School stuff I have covered all on my own. I am not rich, heck Im living pay check to pay check. Child support is set at a certain amount that the courts set up years ago. I think it would be even harder for me, if he was in a stable relationship, living in a better place then we are, in a better set up then we have. Going on amazing trips, while we cant go anywhere. For me, thats just human nature. Until you are the single parent raising the kids alone, you have no idea how hard it is. My ex goes and plays poker on the weekends. Thats money I really could use right now to help with the extra bills involving the kids. I dont know that I would start stuff up, but it would frustrate me a lot more.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Jun. 21, 2010