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Is it normal to feel disappointed?

We find out in 2 weeks (if baby cooperates) what we will be having. This is our 2nd baby. We already have a 4 year old little boy. And I'm really hoping for a girl this time. I already feel like if we find out it's a boy I'm going to be disappointed, and I feel like that makes me such a bad mom. I should be happy with either, as long as the baby is healthy that's all I can really ask for. But I have no control over it. I keep having dreams it's a girl, and I was talking to my mom yesterday and referred to the baby as a girl. And it makes me sad...I know I'll love another little boy just as much, but I'm feeling guilty already that I'm hoping for a girl because I shouldn't be taking this for granted. I should be and I am very grateful to be having another baby, but I shouldn't be rooting for one sex or the other should I? Am I crazy or do other moms feel this way expecting the 2nd baby?

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:47 PM on Jun. 22, 2010 in Pregnancy

Answers (14)
  • Its totally normal to be disappointed. Dont beat yourself up.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:50 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Don't be so hard on yourself! I wanted a boy and felt a little disappointed when my DD was a girl, but Im glad I had her and wouldn't change her for anything! I'm preggo again and want a boy now and feel the same way you do! I think it's pretty common!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:50 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • a lot of moms feel this way. i see this question atleast once a week. i'm REALLY hoping for a boy this time. but i'm not finding out the sex until i deliver. i figure that way i cant be disapointed, and it will be a wonderful surprise. another girl would be fine, dont get me wrong, i would love her just as much, but i'm really wanting a boy!

    Answer by jennifer588 at 12:51 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • NO, I think that can be normal. I KNEW i was having a girl - so when I found out I was pregnant with a boy, it threw me off in to disappointment, it doesn't last long.

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 12:55 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • its ok to be disappointed, but once teh baby comes that will all go out the window! This is my 3rd boy, and several of my friends had all boys as well. When we found out this one was a boy (everyone wanted us to have girls except my sister was hoping for another nephew) my husband and I were disappointed. It took me about a day to get over it and get excited, but that was my experience. I'm really excited to have another boy now. This is how I think of it. Children are blessings from God.... and its not about me and what I get, but rather about the child and how I can be the best mom to the child. My other friend was devastated when she found out she was having her 3rd boy. She prayed everyday that she would be able to love that boy... and after he was born she fell instantly inlove with him and has had more patience etc. withhim than her other two boys. its a process and everyone deals with it differently.

    Answer by Precious333 at 12:55 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Well I hear others go through this but I don't get it. I was always happy for a healthy baby.Sure we all have our preferebces but even with my 3rd who I really wanted to be a boy and was a girl when I found out I was happy because she was healthy!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:56 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • It is normal. I cried when the doc said our second baby was a boy D: I still feel like a jerk for that. Then when we had the u/s for our third baby I knew it was a boy before we went in, but I was still sad about it.
    Now I happy that I have boys, they are fun and always love their mommy best. I wouldn't change them for the world. Am I still a little sad that we never had a girl, yes, but the joy my boys bring to us far outweighs any sad feelings.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 1:03 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Most of the time the mother is right about the sex of the baby. I never knew until she was born..BUT I KNEW mine was a girl ;~)

    I was so into having a girl, that i might have been a bit disappointed if she turned out to be a boy when born...LOL! I had expectations for a girl but i should not have. I kept dreaming about a little girl, i was just convinced! Glad i was right...LOL!

    It's normal. If you find out it's a boy, you may be sad at first, but it will grow on you & you will get used to it & embrace it. So don't even worry yourself about it.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 1:06 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Its very normal. I was really hoping for another girl with this pregnancy but its a boy ...deep down I knew it would be but when I found out, I was a little less than enthused. I'm still getting used to the idea. And I did feel guilty for feeling like that because I already have one boy and one girl so it shouldnt have mattered what the 3rd one would be..but it did to me for various reasons. But I'm really getting myself happy about it now. 13 more weeks to go! And he'll be here...and its been fun going through boy clothes after all the pink we have everywhere now,lol.
    Good Luck on ultrasound in couple weeks.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 1:07 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • It's normal. You know what you want, which is also normal.
    All the best!

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 2:08 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

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