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Why am i considered a bad mom just because my kids do not live with me ?

I have 2 kids and they live with their father and their step mom ... I was talking to a new woman at work and she gave me a weird look when I said that I chose for my kids to live them ...and she was asking questions about if it bugged me or the step mom acts and stuff and basically dropped her jaw when i said that it doesnt bother me that they call their stepmother, Mom, because that shows me that she takes care of them.... I love my kids and I think it is dumb for anyone to assume that I am not a real mom just because of the way I am..... I feel I am in a similar position that a single father is in ..and no one complains about that

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:39 PM on Jun. 22, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (23)
  • Well it would depend on WHY your kids live with their father and step mother.

    Answer by AngeLnChainZ at 3:41 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • as long as you feel they are being taken care of, i dont see a problem. dont worry so much about what others think. just because it's not the norm doesnt mean it's not right.

    Answer by jennifer588 at 3:42 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • I don't think ppl think you a bad mom. It is just in today's society we are brought up to view the 'MOM' as the care giver and when someone choses to go a different route it is strange to us.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Well, to be perfectly honest, it's no one's business but yours. People will find ANY reason to look down on someone. If someone's situation is different than what they consider normal, then someone is a freak or there is something wrong with them. If it bothers you, maybe don't give details to others. But don't feel bad, you can always remind them that your children are happy and that is all you want for them.

    Answer by rio_burb at 3:43 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • maybe you just came off uncaring or something, I guess from reading your post I thought the same thing.. most father's I do know however dont like the fact if the kids call their stepdad DAD.. and MOST dad's don't end up with the kids, they don't choose to have their kids to live with the mother.

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 3:45 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Only you know whats best for your child. If you think living with dad is where they should be, then you are being a great mom by making the best decision for your child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:46 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • My step children call me mom & they also call their bio mother mom. I've known them since they were babies & love them like my own. Why shouldn't they call me mom? They're mom dose not care.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:48 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Honestly?ahe probably thought u just don't care about them or are in bad shape to care for them.
    As long as u know they're being cared for and not abused, it's ok?
    But question.. Why do u rather them live there? [Just a question]

    Answer by kittenripmaygo at 3:49 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • You know my sister in law left her kids to her mom,and then my brother stepped in and took over,I put her down for leaving her kids and not being a mom. I did some thinking about my attitude and realized I wasn't being fair to her by feeling the way I did,but I also feel that every man and woman should be their for their kids no matter what ,and should seek counseling,read books, and ask around for help with their children. There is always help if you want it bad enough,just don't wait for the situation to escalate to a meltdown like my sister in law did. I agree that some situations require a mother to pass on caring for her children if she isn't ready for it mentally. I don't think you are considered a bad mom at all,I think of what happened to her that she cant care for her kids and my heart goes out to you and all the other moms out there walking in your shoes.

    Answer by MarGeee at 3:54 PM on Jun. 22, 2010


    Why do u rather them live there? [Just a question]

    It is just easier I work and their step mom doesnt so she can watch them during the day and I also get me time....but I do get them on most weekends

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:54 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

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