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How do I know when it is time for a divorce?

My husband and I have been married for a little over 4 years. We have a 2 year old son together and both work full time. Since getting married my husband became verbally abusive towards me. He will say things negative about me, how I clean, cook, park the car, drive and my parenting abilities. He also relies on me to take care of EVERYTHING. Dinner is always on the table when he walks in the door, I always take our son to the doctor, drop and pick him up at daycare, do the cleaning, shopping and paying of bills. I just can't take the criticism anymore. I feel like it is killing me inside. I am loosing who I am. I am much happier when he is away. I attempted to talk to him about how I feel a week ago. I told him I was thinking about divorce. He vowed to change his ways. But, a huge part of me doubts him. How can a person change just like that. I don't want to wake up 10 years from now in the same situation.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:21 PM on Jun. 22, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • My mother always told me that if my marriage ever came to that, I would know when it was over & time to leave when I could picture my future without my DH in it.

    For you, I would suggest going to counseling and to just go for yourself if DH won't join you. The counseling may help you to figure out a plan of action one way or the other.

    Hugs mama, and good luck!

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 10:29 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • A marriage is over when you are asking this question..

    Answer by mommy16love at 10:30 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • Dam girl just leave his sorry ass or tell him to get the hell out !

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • when I reached the point that you are at now.

    The day we married, something changed. I became his possession, and it only went down hill from there.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 11:15 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • honestly, if he says he's willing to try to change give him the opportunity. even if he has been a total asshat to you, you'll never know if it could be the best thing for your marriage. Head into couples counseling and you will quickly see just how commmited he is or is not into fixing your marriage. You owe it to yourself and your children to try to keep the family unit together. Marriage is hard work, and sometimes its just easier to not deal with it, but imagine the rewards of making it thru this battle if both parties are comitted to making it work. Good luck!!

    Answer by Lipstk713 at 11:31 PM on Jun. 22, 2010

  • I would leave its hard to be with someone who is negative towards you all of the time and keeps going. I know when you are glad when they are away. I think you have reached that point and when you get to this point all that's left is for you to decide what and where and when. I am leaving in August as well it took alot to get to this point but ask yourself how much more can you take and should you have to take? GL Momma


    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:12 AM on Jun. 23, 2010

  • i sya if you want to make it work give it a chance if your over it then move out and move on.... you need to make sure your happy if your not happy then your kid wont be either they feel what you feel even if you dont show it... they can still feel it. i come from a
    "broken home" and i can tellyou if you are worried about your kid being from one its way better then living in one with ppl fighting and talking bad to one another. kids will be mad and every one will hurt for a lil bite but the sooner you make a choose the sooner you can heal. and if you do it soon the kid might noe even remmber.... but dont stay together because of kids it willl never work if you do... you will just end up hating him. and yeah good luck to you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:52 AM on Jun. 23, 2010

  • If you have to ask, you know it's the end. Something you said was something I said when I realized it wasn't going to change and he was only giving me lip service to keep me from going.

    " I am loosing who I am."

    I said the same thing and I am happier on my own. Just me and my son here, and he sees his dad very often and we're in the process of divorce. It's tough at times, but honestly, I don't regret my decision. I knew he wasn't going to change and he is an overbearing and verbally abusive person as well.

    Answer by rio_burb at 8:54 AM on Jun. 23, 2010

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