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hold long should he have her for

I had a baby she is 6 weeks now, and me and the dad live totally different lifestyles, as i have 2 other kids and he works in a bar.
he loves his baby but here is the problem he is taking her for 8-9 hours, he now has had two days this week of 9 hours he has taken her to a bar, out and about to a ton of people, and all while telling me he is at home with the baby, and then today which is second time he has had her for 5 hours i txt him 3 hours ago asking if she is fine and for him to txt me if there is anything. i have gotten no answer at all.. I feel super nerves.. and I honestly dont want him to have her for that long, as i am starting to feel excluded from her life.. how much time should he get with a 6 week old baby?? and can I demand that he tells me were he takes her..

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:41 PM on Jun. 23, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (8)
  • Are you guys not together? If you aren't, then unless he gets a paternity test or pays child support, he doesn't have any rights to her at all. So technically until paternity is proven, you could decide to let him see her at all. A court would absolutely be on your side in this matter considered a bar is no place for a MINOR, let alone a 6 week old child! I would def. not be okay with this situation...especially since he's lying to you about where he's taking her.
    Ash9724

    Answer by Ash9724 at 11:47 PM on Jun. 23, 2010

  • There is no way that I would even let my husband separate me from my baby for that long.
    If this guy wants to see her so bad, he can come to your house and help out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:52 PM on Jun. 23, 2010

  • I only agreed because i am at work, and he said its a bar and grill, so its a family place untill 9.. which is bs I mean this place is know for its fights and stuff on the weekends.. I agreed thinking he would understand I wanted to know were she is.. but now he is just acting like he is the worlds greatest dad.. he mad comments putting me down and stuff and it super hurts.. he signed the birthcrt and we did dna and stuff but he doesnt pay childsupport
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 PM on Jun. 23, 2010

  • I agree with anon. I would never let her be gone from my side for that long, especially if he wasn't answering my messages and I had no clue where they were at. What the heck is he doing running all over town with a 6 week old baby for half the day anyways? That's really weird to me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 PM on Jun. 23, 2010

  • If you absolutely need him to watch her, you need to get some kind of court order on the amount of time he can have her, and the places that it is appropriate to take a child. I would honestly try and get supervised visitiation at the least.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:01 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • I dont need him too, I was agreeing cause I was trying to make friends with him so he would be in her life.. and now he is taking it to whole different level.. I just dont know what to do.. Is it fair if I tell him that fact that he didnt let me know where he is going with her after i told him i wanted to know is not okay, and that i wont let him have her for that long next time till he can show me he is an adult and can follow the rules i give him
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:13 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • Yea, I wouldn't allow dad to have more than 2-3 hours MAX.... and supervised in case baby needs to nurse.
    LeanneC

    Answer by LeanneC at 1:47 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

  • You had him sign the birth certificate. In the eyes of the law that baby is as much his as yours. You need to go down and file for custody, support, and a visitation agreement before he finds out he can get custody and support from you. With the way the courts are now he could get custody and the judge could order you to pay him support.


    In Indiana the non-custodial parent has the right to care for the child while the custodial parent is at work. They can do whatever they want. The custodial parent doens't pay for child care and support isn't reduced. It's called right of first refusal (unless it has changed recently). So he could have the baby while you work on top of 50% of the other time.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 9:43 AM on Jun. 24, 2010

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